Tom Jennings: No Frills Vampire

[Bob_the_Bartender]

Dear Fellow Dark Shadows Fans,

We've all probably noticed how sartorially splendid the vampiric Barnabas Collins looks in all of those snazzy suits and that cool Inverness coat of his.  Of course, Angelique, the lady vampire,  has also been quite the vision of loveliness in her stylish dresses and perfectly coiffed blonde hair.

And, then along comes good, old Tom Jennings, former local handyman, current drab, dismally-attired vampire.  I mean, have you checked out that depressing, Larry Talbotlike brown shirt that he's wearing?  And, what, not even a sports coat for the 24-year-old bloodsucker?

If Barnabas and Angelique are the Brooks Brothers and Neiman Marcus of vampirism, respectively, then good, old Tom Jennings has got to be either the Habands or Cost Cutters of creatures of the night.


While Barnabas and Angelique both have finely carved caskets, old Tom has a casket (which, you will soon see) that looks as if he picked it up on sale at the local Home Depot.


By the way, is it me, or does Tom Jennings "speak" in a rather slow and ponderous manner when he telepathically communicates with Julia?  "Julia,....I....want....to ....be....with....you.  Come....to....me,....Julia."  Tom kind of reminds me of former Vice President Al Gore.  "I....want...to....be....your....next ....president.  Please....vote....for....me."

Sincerely,

Bob the Bartender, former clothing consultant to Yanos Skorzeny

[Annie]

Hi,Bob your  posts really crack me up!!!
It's ture though about Tom Jennings gosh, they
ought to at least give him a mansion to live in
or a luxary hotel complete with vampire clothing
and shaving gel for night time fun!!
                           Love Anne

[Bj]

While Barnabas and Angelique both have finely carved caskets, old Tom has a casket (which, you will soon see) that looks as if he picked it up on sale at the local Home Depot.

Thanks, Bob! I was wondering where I could pick up a basic coffin for cheap. No way I'm paying those funeral parlor prices for one!  

[Raineypark]

Actually, Bob, I thought he sounded like he was TRYING to sound like Gregory Peck.  And failing.

Rainey

[Bob_the_Bartender]

Raineypark,

Gregory Peck to David Niven in the "Guns Of Navarone,":  "You're....in....it....now.  Up....to....your....neck!!!"

Bob the Bartender, who fell in love with Audrey Hepburn in her great flick, "Roman Holiday," with that great actor, Gregory Peck a/k/a/ "Mr. Excitement!"

[Raineypark]

Watch It!!!

I LOVE Atticus Finch!

Rainey

[Bob_the_Bartender]

It's too bad that you never heard Mr. Peck tell his famously droll joke about the "AFTRA-Shaving Laotian."

Bob the Bartender, who wonders if Willie Loomis is, in fact, the "Boo Radley" of Collinsport?

[Raineypark]

Bob the Bartender, who wonders if Willie Loomis is, in fact, the "Boo Radley" of Collinsport?

Oh MY GOD!!  That is SOOO CRUEL!!

Willie bears NO resemblance to Boo Radley.

On the other hand, Boo Radley is one of the most exquisitely conceived characters in American literature.  I may love Willie, but sorry, he doesn't even exist in the same universe as Boo Radley.

Rainey

[RingoCollins]

as if he picked it up on sale at the local Home Depot.

I was thinking 'The Container Store', or 'Crate and Barrel'

By the way, is it me, or does Tom Jennings "speak" in a rather slow and ponderous manner when he telepathically communicates with Julia?  "Julia,....I....want....to ....be....with....you.  Come....to....me,....Julia."  Tom kind of reminds me of former Vice President Al Gore.  "I....want...to....be....your....next ....president.  Please....vote....for....me."

And usually away from the camera - Gregory Peckory - or what was that villian's name on the 'Alf tales' cartoon that sounded like Jimmy Stewart?  "wa, wa wat"

[Dr. Eric Lang]

Hey Bob, give the poor vamp a break! He just crawled out of his grave and hasn't had a chance to shop yet! It's not like he has a cache of hidden jewels hidden somewhere like Barnabas did. He'll either need to attack a shopkeeper or a well-dressed villager.

Now bring me my tankard of ale, barkeep!

[kuanyin]

I suspect that they figured he was such eye candy that they needn't waste extra wardrobe money! Noone would notice what he wore anyway. Though we will certainly notice what he DOESN'T wear in upcoming episodes.

I love this part of the show when Dan Curtis finally figured out that to have some good looking young men on the show wouldn't hurt the ratings any!

As for his acting, I have always considered Briscoe to deserve the "most improved" DS acting award.

[Craig_Slocum]

Bob_the_Bartender wrote:

While Barnabas and Angelique both have finely carved caskets, old Tom has a casket (which, you will soon see) that looks as if he picked it up on sale at the local Home Depot.

Or maybe they had a Saturday workshop. My daughter  went to one at The Home Depot here in Las Vegas, and built a wooden step stool.  

[Tanis]

Tom Jennings is a generic vampire.

Barnabas is Brand Name.

Like Barnabas is Orbach's and Jennings is Wal-Mart

Oh well.

Tanis

[Bob_the_Bartender]

Dear Dr. Eric Lang,

Your point about the young, impecunious vampire, Tom Jennings, is well taken.  I've always thought that every vampire is as affluent and naturally stylish as Barnabas, Angelique and, of course, the original one, Count Dracula.

Tom Jennings was a simple handyman in life.  It's going to take some time for him to adjust to his somewhat "loftier" position as a creature of the night.  Heck, I'm surprised that Tom isn't ambling around the grounds of Collinwood, attired in a flannel shirt and a pair of faded L.L. Bean jeans just like master carpenter Norm Abrams on "This Old House"!

I'm sure you'll agree with me that young Tom made a very good, first choice in victims when he selected Dr. Julia Hoffman.  As a psychiatrist with her own clinic, the good doctor is obviously well off financially.

You know, as a new and aspiring vampire, Tom should adopt the motto of the US Air Force and "Aim High!"  So, I think that Tom should plant his best "vespertilian hickey"on the fabulously wealthy mistress of Collinwood. (Who, I believe, should be returning home shortly.)  

If Mrs. Stoddard could keep that lyrically larcenous Irishman, Jason McGuire, dressed in fine threads, she can certainly keep a fine, young lad like Tom Jennings dressed to the "nines."  (Tom Jennings could be Liz's "boy-toy.")

It just won't pay in the long run for Tom to make victims of such impoverished (albeit lovely) ladies as Maggie Evans, Vicky Winters, or Susie the waitress .  Then again, nubile Collins heiress, Carolyn Stoddard, would make a perfect third victim after Tom has added both Julia and Liz to his "harem."

By the way, Dr. Lang, I must tell you how much I miss the witty comedic rapport between you and your former associate, Jeff Clark.  The show has just not been the same since we have seen the apparent end of your wonderful collaborative schtick.

Now, will that be either Coors or Rolling Rock in your tankard of ale?

Sincerely,

Bob the Bartender, who realizes that in New England, a bartender has to earn his tips!  

[scout75]

I have always considered Briscoe to deserve the "most improved" DS acting award.

As opposed to...?

One of the cardboard tombstones on the cemetery set? A wingback chair? A snifter of brandy? The ubiquitous boom mike shadow?