Episode #0017

 

Liz: Now, take Isaac - he was really forward thinking. Even though he lived in the late 17th century, he dressed as though he lived in the late 19th. Sure, people thought he was odd - but he was a TRUE Collins - and he's the sort you should model yourself after, David...

Liz: And speaking of fashion forward thinking, you'll notice that I'm wearing a Madonna cone bra under my dress. People today have no idea who Madonna will be - but I do - and in less than 20 years they will too...

David:  Aunt Liz, are you sure Ulysses S. Grant was the mayor of Collinsport before he became President?

Aunt Liz: Yes David, and whenever i see this painting i get goose bumps all over me!

L: To the OUTSIDE world Issac was a MAN'S MAN, but in private?  QUEEN!  

"Yes, David, your grandfather always remarked that Isaac bore an uncanny resemblance to D.H. Lawrence.  Then again, old Ike also had the novelist's same 'continental' attitudes, if you ask me."    

Isaac bore an uncanny resemblance to D.H. Lawrence.

OMG - he does! I've never noticed that until you just pointed it out. And Lawrence certainly would have fitted in with the Collins clan. 

I forget which one of the Smith brothers he was, but living here in Maine, those cough drops are worth their weight in gold.

"Yes David, as you can tell from this portrait, we've been transferred over to the sitcom The Ghost and Mrs. Muir!    Get ready for Charles Nelson Reilly running all over the place wetting himself in fear!    Fear of the supernatural was never so fun!"

ECS:  Behind that portrait there's a safe.  It's empty, but when I was a child, my great-aunt Nora told me there was a vampire chained in his coffin in there.  She said her grandmother told her about it.  I used to be scared to come into the drawing room.  Silly of me!

Liz:  "Oh, I don't know who that is David.  We picked up a bunch of old paintings at some charity auction once and now everyone goes around assuming they're family ancestors."

Elizabeth: "I'm afraid that isn't the original portrait. That was done by someone named Charles Alabama Tate or something. My father burned it because it kept changing all the time."

Elisabeth:  When I was in a high school play that man was my understudy.  Our director was weird, but I always showed up and never forgot a line.