Dear Fellow Dark Shadows Fans,
Here's an episode of the paranormal show, "Sightings," that I'd like to see:
"On this edition of 'Sightings':
Does a 237-year-old vampire still exist in the tiny coastal town of Collinsport, ME? Join host Tim White and executive producer Henry "The Fonz" Winkler as they motorcycle into this quaint New England town to investigate claims of vampirism, witchcraft and time travel.
Mr. Winkler, in his Arthur Fonzarelli attire, will interview local resident (and yenta) Buzz Hackett about the eerie goings on in this quiet Maine town. Mr. Hackett, a longtime friend of the prominent Collins family of Collinsport, will elucidate on the legend of the so-called 'Collins Curse,' and, answer the question, is the curse still in effect today?
Host Tim White will discuss the rumors of Satanic rites and, a still active coven of witches with noted local historian and academic, Prof. T. Elliot Stokes.
As an extra feature, famed ghost-hunter Peter James will attempt to communicate with the spirit of the good witch, Bathia Mapes, rumored to have suffered a fiery death at the hands of the most evil witch of the Colonial period.
Finally, 'Sightings' correspondent Carla Wohl will attempt to detemine if, in fact, local doctor Julia Hoffman is, as rumored, one the masked surgeons seen performing the medical examination on the so-called Roswell- Alien Autopsy Film.
Don't miss this riveting edition of 'Sightings'!"
And remember, no mystery is closed to an open mind. Isn't that something like, "A mind is a terrible thing to waste"? (I think that either Dirk Wilkins or Jeremy Grimes once said that.)