"Bad" Horror

[ProfStokes]

To address the flip side of the "What is 'Good Horror'" discussion (which, BTW, I've really enjoyed reading; you've all made such perceptive comments and admirable guidelines, and some of the films mentioned have really grabbed my curiosity.  Those replies were so well-written and considerately thought out that I almost regret doing this, but I am curious...) I thought that I would bring up the issue of 'bad horror' movies (aka "schlock theater.")  I'm sure that we've all seen plenty.  They're films that probably should never have been made, yet by miracle or mistake they were.  Why have we watched them, and why do they have such underground popularity?  

As a fan of "MST3K," I've seen quite a few flicks that were more horrible than horrific, and not just from the '50's sci-fi era.  However, I've also seen B-movies that surpassed my meager expectations, films that I actually liked for whatever bizarre reasons.  It's my opinion that some of these films get slighted more for their cheap special effects than any truly flagrant shortcomings (not unlike DS.)  

For example, I'd heard several disparaging things about The Crawling Eye, but I was curious to see it nevertheless since it's a cult classic.   About two years ago, I finally did.  Aside from the pathetic appearance of the eye itself and the annoying little doctor who began every line with "Well, Alan," it really wasn't such a terrible little movie.  It didn't exactly keep me in suspense, but I was interested to see how the various plot points were drawn together (a psychic girl's mysterious seizures, frozen zombies returning to town, hapless, beheaded mountain climbers, and a strange, radioactive cloud hovering over the mountain.)  It seemed just a bit more complex and creative than the basic monster-stalks-innocent-people story that I'd envisioned.  I think I expected to see the eye take Godzilla's place and sweep through a town, snatching up people from the streets.  I'm glad that it wasn't so simplistic, and I honestly got a bigger kick out of that movie than I probably should have.

To get to my point, what are some of the silliest, cheesiest, lousiest "horror" movies that you've seen and why would you classify them as such?  Also, are there any "bad" movies that you actually enjoyed and why?

ProfStokes

[Blue_Whale_Barfly]

My choice would be another MST3K classic:

"Manos, the Hands of Fate"

[Craig_Slocum]

Another MST3K classic, The Screaming Skull! This is lousy, slow moving, and sometimes funnier than scary. A movie that I haven't seen since 1979 would fit here too, The Brood. That was a total flop, never to be seen again. Not much action until near the end of the film, by then who cares?  

[Raineypark]

 

For example, I'd heard several disparaging things about The Crawling Eye,

Oh my gawd!!  "THE CRAWLING EYE"!!!!!

My older brother got into the worst trouble of his childhood because of that movie!!  My parents were going out for the evening (an almost unheard-of occasion, poor things) and left me in the care of my brother, who is 5 years older than I.

Being the world-class tease that he was (still is!) he thought it would be funny to let me stay up late for a "treat".  The "treat" was "The Crawling Eye" being broadcast on one of the local NY stations.  

He turned off the lights and the movie began.  I was probably shrieking within minutes just from the music....and by the time my parents got home I was in full fledged hysterics.  So much for their evening out.  My brother wasn't allowed out of his room (except for school) for a week....most boring week of my life actually!!

Thanks for reminding me of this ProfStokes....I think I'll go call and remind him!

Rainey

[CastleBee]

I saw tons of these films on our local Friday night spooky show "Nightmare Theater" when I was growing up.  I do recall a couple of real outstanding stinkers from that day - "Bucket of Blood" and "The Tingler".  We got a lot of laugh mileage out of both of those.  The first was about a failed artist who resorts to drugging and then encasing live people in plaster and passing them off as his work. The second is about some kind of creature that is produced in a person's spine when they're terrified. Of course, the creature is removed somehow and ends up terrorizing everyone in town. I may not be really accurate in those descriptions since it's been awhile since I've seen them.  I enjoyed those shows because they were so much fun to pick apart¢â‚¬¦apparently my sister, cousins and friends weren't the only ones to enjoy this kind of thing since MST3K had to be born out of the same idea (why didn't we think of THAT!).  I miss Nightmare Theater and those cheesy old films that were so bad they were good.  

[Daphne]

What on *EARTH* is MST3K?  ?!? ?!?

The worst movie I've even seen was "Hollow Man," which is actually coming out on DVD....it's a porno movie in the disguise of a horror flick. Oyy >.< It was terrible! The concept of it was interesting, although a bit redundant, and the special effects were really kewl, but the plot was like ...... just stupid. I like moves that make you think...or that make you so scared you can't think, or ones that leave you in so much awe you want to think but you can't [like Stigmata]. LOL, but I guess that belongs on the other post....that long 4-page thingie over there *points* LOL

OOOOOOOO *has an epiphany* MST3K is Mystery Sci Theatre 3 Thousand!!! WOW .... but I still don't get what it is. Some weird show like Alfred Hitcock Presents, only they did movies instead of tv episodes? *is still confused* I think it must be a generation thing or something, lol. *le sigh* too bad i wasn't alive in the 60s.... :-/

[Mark Rainey]

There's such a huge catalogue of bad horror that it's difficult to single out specific entries. But in the last few years, Stephen King's ROSE RED stands out as a monument to poor filmmaking, characterization, casting, storytelling, pacing, acting, you name it.... I ended up turning it off halfway through, afraid that I might be arrested for criminal wasting of time if I left it on.

And speaking of STIGMATA, I'd include it in about the same category. It was a movie that tried very hard to disguise the fact that its whole premise was worse than flawed from the get-go....

Some of the timeless classics of terrible horror (and/or sci-fi) include the following (in no particular order):

THE GIANT CLAW: Features the ugliest puppet turkey-buzzard you'll ever see anywhere.

THE CREEPING TERROR: Stars the famous walking carpet that eats underpaid extras. Due to a lost and/or unusable soundtrack, the whole movie was narrated, to infuriating effect. The sound of the monster's roar was somebody twisting the dial of a short-wave radio.

THE GIANT SPIDER INVASION: The title character is a Volkswagen in a giant spider costume, which parades through a small town eating underpaid extras.

GOKE--BODY SNATCHER FROM HELL: A Japanese attempt at soul-searing horror that, with a 110-minute running time, runs 109 minutes too long. The original Japanese soundtrack is nothing to brag upon, but the English dubbed version is downright painful.

BARBARELLA: I have tried no less than a dozen times to watch this movie. I've never made it for more than 30 minutes at a sitting.

Every FRIDAY THE 13TH movie, except perhaps the first one, and it's iffy.

Every Michael Myers movie, except the first HALLOWEEN, which is a minor classic.

Every CHILD'S PLAY movie.

Every 1980s rip-off slasher film.

Every 1990s rip-off slasher film.

I do not include the NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET movies, even though some of them stink worse than a week-old corpse; the first one was almost OK, and a couple of the follow-ups have their moments.

And on and on.... There are more entries than could ever be listed here....

There are a lot of "bad" or "cheesy" horror flicks that I love, though. Sometimes it's a fine line between being awful and being fun. A lot of low-budget movies that don't take themselves seriously can be hugely entertaining, even though by any objective criteria they hardly hold water. Some of my personal favorites in this category include the following:

BARON BLOOD
THE BLOB
COUNT YORGA, VAMPIRE / RETURN OF COUNT YORGA
THE CRATER LAKE MONSTER
THE DUNWICH HORROR
FROGS
FROM BEYOND
THE GREEN SLIME
KRONOS
THE LEGEND OF BOGGY CREEK
THE LEGEND OF HILLBILLY JOHN
THE MONOLITH MONSTERS
THE MONSTER FROM BLACK LAKE
MONSTER ON THE CAMPUS
PHANTASM (including sequels)
REANIMATOR
RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD (including sequels)
SASQUATCH--THE LEGEND OF BIGFOOT
TEENAGERS FROM OUTER SPACE
WILLARD

And on and on.... Again, there are so many here that I could wear myself out just thinking about them.

Your mileage may vary...

[shadow=maroon,left,300]--Mark[/shadow]

[Luciaphile]

Daphne wrote:

OOOOOOOO *has an epiphany* MST3K is Mystery Sci Theatre 3 Thousand!!! WOW .... but I still don't get what it is. Some weird show like Alfred Hitcock Presents, only they did movies instead of tv episodes? *is still confused* I think it must be a generation thing or something, lol. *le sigh* too bad i wasn't alive in the 60s....  

LOL, well, it's actually more of a 90s thing.  It's a TV show that, IIRC, got its start via local cable public access.  It got picked up by the Comedy Channel and then moved to SciFi.  A man and a couple of robots are trapped aboard the Satellite of Love and are forced by a couple of evil entities to watch horrible movies.  There are skits with the robot puppets and the people before, during, and after the movie.  

My favorite parts are during the movies.  They used chromakey (which is the DS main trick!) and you get the effect of a movie theatre with the MST3K crew up front.  They watch the film and throughout make snarky, sarcastic comments.  It's hysterical and often improves the films you see.  Sci Fi still airs repeats although sadly the folks behind the production moved onto other projects.

I'm sure that we've all seen plenty.  They're films that probably should never have been made, yet by miracle or mistake they were.  Why have we watched them, and why do they have such underground popularity?  

For me, this is what I call "Trainwreck TV"--schlock so bad you cannot turn away.

I think what you're talking about is "good" bad horror.

To get to my point, what are some of the silliest, cheesiest, lousiest "horror" movies that you've seen and why would you classify them as such?  Also, are there any "bad" movies that you actually enjoyed and why?

The Thing that Wouldn't Die is probably one of the worst and a personal favorite.  As to why it was bad--well, they have this Oklahoma!/State Fair kind of backdrop, cardboard hero, slutty and randy secondary characters and a severed head.   The dialogue reeked.  The historical facts were way the hell off.  But it all came together in some wonderful horrid mess and I liked it.

Donovan's Brain has so-so production values and Nancy Davis (a future first lady starring in a movie about a brain in an ersatz garage that is trying to take over the world, what more could you want?), but it's a cool film.  Not sure it belongs in this thread though . . .

I think that a lot of these movies have enduring popularity for a variety of reasons:

1. They often address the forbidden or taboo in a way that an A-list film would have never dared to do or in a way that is distinctly satisfying.  Dark side of sexuality stuff.  

2. They don't have pretensions.  When a big budget film fails, there's generally no pity (e.g. the remake of The Haunting.  When these come out, the audience has lowered or forgiving expectations.  

3. They often have some good actors in them.  I read somewhere that Bette Davis once remarked that you do horror when you're on your way up or on your way down.  Or you get actors who have made a hit with the genre and decide to run all the way to the bank.  True, it can be embarrassing to watch on occasion, but for every bimbo in a Hammer production, there was usually Peter Cushing.  

4. Sometimes (and this may sound weird), there's something almost enjoyable in the fact that the people behind the film missed  the point in such an obvious way.  Some of the creature films are like this.  I'm sorry, but most of us can't get too excited about films about giant mutant bunnies (Anya excepted ).  The best horror films exploit our primal fears.  The worst seem to have not gotten this concept.

5. When all else fails, they are really, really funny.

Luciaphil

[Philippe Cordier]

One that comes to mind that was awful was "Motel Hell."  The only reason I saw it was because a friend of ours had a principal role in it, so it was fun to see for that reason but otherwise a waste of time.

[kuanyin]

"Motel Hell"!!! Now, THAT was a movie! A really bad, but quite enjoyable movie, GREAT example. Another one I loved was "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes".

[Josette]

From Mark's list - I think it might have been either "The Creeping Terror" or "The Green Slime" - I don't remember the title, but either of those sound like it could be the title of a movie I remember.  It involved some sort of swamp thing that came into down devouring everyone.  I remember laughing all through it!!

However, while I don't remember anything about it now, at the time I liked "Count Yorga, Vampire."

"The Monolith Monsters" - I'm pretty sure that's the one I'm thinking of.  I think it's another that I originally laughed through, but on repeated viewing, I seem to recall that I came to appreciate it!

Luciaphil mentions "Donovan's Brain" - I don't really remember much about that, either, but I do recall the title and have a vague impression of it.

[Bouchard]

I'll Make A List:

Dean Koontz's Phantoms
Army Of Darkness
Halloween III: Season of the Witch
The Blob
Hellraiser
Sorority House Massacre 2

Okay, time to explain. Phantoms: It went too slow for me, and was boring! Army Of Darkness: The whole thing is stupid, and the corniness made me laugh! Halloween III Season of of the Witch: I can't believe John Carpenter made this pile of dog crap! Especially, without Michael Myers! I don't even see this as part of the HALLOWEEN series, which I love! Halloween is my favorite movie. But, this movie sucks ass! The Blob: BORING! Hellraiser: BORING! Sorority House Massacre 2: It had bad acting, it showed lots of boobs though. The idea of this movie was pretty good, and if it had better people making and starring it, it would be great.

[Cassandra]

Every Michael Myers movie, except the first HALLOWEEN, which is a minor classic.

Every CHILD'S PLAY movie.

These are my choices as well.  Im sick to death of seeing another "Chucky" movie coming out. I lost count after the first three. The last one out was "Chucky Takes A Bride." That had to be the worst of them all!!  Seeing these two things getting married and prancing around town, and then stopping at a hotel actually made the movie look more ridiculous than scary. And just when you thought you FINALLY saw the last of Chucky, the bride doll gives birth to Chucky jr. at the end!  Which probably means they'll be another movie that will soon be added to the list!

[Bobubas]

Also, are there any "bad" movies that you actually enjoyed and why?

ProfStokes

Hmmm.....Dr.Giggles immediately comes to mind.

[Gerard]

My vote (not counting Ed Wood films - they're in a category all their own) is for a film Mark pointed out:  "The Giant Claw".  That stuffed buzzard with the goofy expression is by far the most hysterical looking monster ever to grace the golden screen.

I've blanked now (I'll wake up at three in the morning and remember it) on the name of the second worst.  It was about a group of survivors at the end of the world, when it's invaded by alien robots who are actually guys running around in gorilla suits with round bowls on their heads, given orders by a "computer" which is a from-the-prop-room radio which they keep on a table in a cave.

Gerard