MB,

If "Silent" Suzie (or is it Susie?) had taken Maggie/Josette's place as Barnabas' new love interest, perhaps she could have taken a page out of either the great Dorothy McGuire's acting book in "The Spiral Staircase" or the great Jane Wyman's acting book in "Johnny Belinda" to have conveyed her emotions by artfully employing facial expressions, movements  and hand gestures?

Bob the Bartender, President of the Demi Moore Fan Club, an actress of "unremitting" subtlety and also of stunning superficiality! 

Hey gang,

Of all of the most disagreeable members of the Collins family (and with PT1970 Quentin Collins and 1840's Gabriel Collins there have been more than just a few of them), I  find Judith Collins-Trask, the late-19th century mistress of Collinwood, the most difficult to figure out.

When we first see Judith during the start of the 1897 storyline, Judith almost seems to revel in locking horns with her younger brothers, uppity Edward and Carl "The Comedian" Collins, for control of the family fortune.  When perpetual bad-boy Quentin Collins shows up, Judith wastes no love on the youngest and, aguably, most charming Collins sibling either.

Of course, Judith is "slightly" less than thoughtful and generous towards the members of the Collinwood staff as well; Judith treats Collinwood head groundskeeper Dirk Wilkins like the proverbial peon (but, then again, Dirk does eventually even the score with his bumptious boss), and, the shameles way that Judith treats the long-suffering, but, ever-faithful Beth Chavez is way beyond the pale.

In addition, being the inveterate nasty-yenta that she is, Judith tries (unsuccessfully) to convince Collins family matriarch Grandmama Edith Collins to evict Edith's friend/fortuneteller, Magda Racosi and Magda's picaresque husband, Sandor, from the Old House.  In short, Judith Collins is an extremely parsimonious and cynical individual, who probably wouldn't give her own loving mother the time of day on Christmas morning.

And, yet, after Edith dies and leaves virtually everything in her will to Judith and in sole charge of Collinwood, what does "Miss Misanthrope of 1897" do?  She proceeds to fall in love with the shifty Rev. Gregory Trask, a true Tartuffe, and a man I like to think of as "The Eliot Spitzer of Collinsport, Maine"!  I mean, how could someone as suspicious and  judgmental as Judith fall for a pious con man like the Rev. Trask?  (And Judith marries the oily and sanctimonious creep about a week, maybe, after the "reverend" has his "beloved" wife Minera "offed." Go figure!)

So, is Judith the shrew to end all shrews or is she a poor, misunderstood and, ultimately, lonely soul, looking for love in, most decidely, the wrong place?

Bob the Bartender

The Dark Shadows final 1840 Parallel Time storyline (without Barnabas, Julia, Wille, etc.) was about as "fascinating" and "engrossing" as the last season of That '70s Show (without Eric Forman and Michael Kelso) or After-M*A*S*H (without Hawkeye Pierce, Hot-Lips Houlihan, etc.), imho.     

i wonder what bronson watched(while drinking warm alcohol from a glass with no ice)during those dreary days and nights up in bangor snooping around for burke?

I imagine that old Stu got a kick out of tuning into Boston Celtic basketball games (against the Knicks. of course), "Truth or Consequences,"  "Bozo the Clown," "The Dating Game,"  "Firing Line" (a great sure-cure for insomnia) and repeats of "The Honeymooners."

Hey gang,

With all of the unusual medical "practices" in Collinsport, Maine, which doctor do you think has to shell out the most for medical malpractice insurance for his or her practice?

Is it Dr. Julia Hoffman, slightly "ethically-wishy-washy" psychiatrist, who dabbles on the side in her practice in an attempt to cure a 171-year-old vampire of his curse, resuscitate a mean-and-nasty 17th century warlock and create a female mate of questionable morality (I might add!) for a male manmade monster, suffering from a severe case of raging hormones...

Or, is it Dr. Eric Lang, surgeon/G.P./mad scientist extraordinare, who also attempts to cure that same vampire of his curse, create a new race of human beings from corpses, and also tries to remove the head of a man with, arguably, Collinsport's most lustrous and perfectly-coiffed head of hair (even more lustrous and perfectly-coiffed than Amanda Harris' stunning locks!)?

I tell you, it would probably been enough for the beloved, longtime Collinsport family physician, Dr. Dave Woodard (a/ka/ "Old Doc Woodard"), to have packed his bags and taken off for somewhere comparatively more tranquil, peaceful and definitely less expensive than Collinsport, Maine, say, like Camden, New Jersey or Gary, Indiana!  

Bob-the-Bartender

They have writers?   I doubt we'd see a difference during the strike.

The very thought of Maury Povich without idiot cards to read off of while he's conducting those probing, yet, heartfelt interviews on his show.  Heck, that's like the esteemed Dr. Eric Lang appearing in a commercial to extoll the benefits of Levitra or Beano without the use of a teleprompter!   

Yes indeed, self-flagellation and the Red Sox go together like peanut butter and marshmallow fluff.  History will show that the 2004 World Series was won by the parallel time Sox.  And that Leonardo DaVinci predicted it.

Separated at birth:


Red Sox "Reliever" Eric Gagne and Count Andreas Petofi? :- 

A belated happy birthday to Long Island's most iconoclastic Virgo!

Bob the Bartender, President of the local Collinsport Young-At-Heart Chapter (I think?)