If DS were still on the air today, I suspect that during the closing credits of the show, we’d see a line, stating:

fashions courtesy of

LL Bean,

instead of the old and extremely familiar line:

fashions courtesy of

ORHBACH’S. 

Oh, Gerard,

Your recounting of frequenting US malls, where they filmed horror and slasher films got me to wondering if Dan Curtis and his writers had based DS storylines in a Collinsport Mall in April of 1971 and well beyond?

Would we have seen the uber-cool and iconoclastic Buzz Hackett and new girlfriend (maybe Willie’s former and never-seen girlfriend, Roxanne?) chilling out in the mall and goofing on all the local squares shopping at the LL Bean Store and at The Dollar Store. Although, the Buzz-Man himself, might casually stroll into the local Wilson’s House of Leather Store to check-out the latest motorcycle jackets on sale, 

And, speaking of LL Bean, one of my own personal favorite stores, just think of how many proud Collinsport residents, would shop in this legendary outdoor store, which was started in their in their own home state of
Maine!

No doubt, such outdoor, local macho guys like Joe Haskell, George Patterson and Matthew Morgan would buy all of their rugged (and SPF-treated) hunting and fishing attire at the venerable LL Bean’s. And, of course, the always sartorially-splendid Bob Rooney would also shop at that same LL Bean Store, where he bought all of those seemingly limitless assortment of LL Bean flannel shirts, which he wore while tending bar at the Blue
Whale. I tell you, even today in 2024, I aspire to even attempt to, albeit, vainly try and match the style, class and unfailing fashion sense of my personal role model in life, Mr. Bob Rooney, Collinsport’s own Beau Brummell, extraodinaure! 

And, let’s not forget Sarah Johnson, the faithful, albeit, perpetually-grumpy Collinwood housekeeper/cook. While the practical and frugal (to put it mildly) Collins family employee would be a regular shopper at The Dollar Store, I suspect that she would occasionally splurge and buy some rather stylish and decidedly provocative ladies’ undergarments at the local Victoria’s Secret to wear under those staid and matronly black dresses of hers.


I bet that even the eternally-youthful Grand Ma-Ma Edith Collins would have gleefully dispatched the prim and proper Judith Collins to pick Edith up, the latest daring and sophisticated ladies’ lingerie IF there had been a local Victoria’s Secret store in Collinsport, circa 1897!  Heck, Edith was probably QUITE the stunning dresser back when she was blossoming into beautiful, young womanhood back during the War of 1812! 



And, finally, what would Barnabas be shopping for today in a local Collinsport shopping mall. I remember that the late actor Ben Cross wore a cool and stylish leather jacket, when he portrayed Barnabas Collins on the 1991 NBC DS series. Wouldn’t the late, great Jonathan Frid also have looked like a million dollars if he, too, had worn a leather jacket from Wilson’s House of Leather as Barnabas entered the great house of Collinwood? 

And, instead of his traditional black dress shoes (bought at Brooks Brothers, of course), Barnabas decided to wear a pair of more youthful, comfortable and definitely “with-it” slider/shoes? Heck, they would have been so much easier to slip-on and slip-off whenever Barnabas was getting in or out if that under-sized coffin of his.

Oh, I could drone on and on about how cool, a contemporary Barnabas would look like, sporting a nose ring and other body jewelry, in addition to assorted tattoos all-over his body, but I won’t.

Suffice to say, I do worry about what might have happened to the venerable and truly beloved Brewster’s Department Store, IF a brand new shopping mall did pop-up in Collinsport, Maine. 

Hey Bob, wondered the same thing I hope Barnabas didn’t fall out of his coffin. Ouch.

Anne,

Yes, that would have been a great scene to have seen on the show, an angst-ridden Willie trying to help his understandably ticked-offed master back into his undersized coffin. 

By the way, it might not have been the best of ideas to have taken a walk along Widow’s Hill right when the earthquake hit at 10:23 AM (EST)! 

Bob

PS I wonder if they also felt the earthquake over in Parallel Time? If they did, I hope that the unbelievably insufferable Quentin Collins got knocked on his keester. 

Wouldn’t it have been great if RD had portrayed a werewolf on DS? I can just see him, preening even more than Cher or the late Farrah Fawcett, as he stroked and even caressed that magnificent head of lycanthropic hair during his transformation into the “wolf man” of Collinsport!!! 

And, as far as the mezza-mezza (so-so) Tim Burton 2012 DS film is concerned, well, at least it wasn’t as nearly disappointing as “Godfather III” was. 

Anne,

I loved “Barnaby Jones” when it was on CBS during the 1970s. And, this must have been an especially exciting episode of BJ featuring Buddy Ebsen and the ubiquitous Dennis Patrick; it must have been like crafty, old Barnaby (remind you of another guy with a very similar Christian name?) matching wits with business tycoon Paul Stoddard, a very successful man, who is haunted by a terrible secret from his past.

Bob

PS Grecian Formula would have been a very appropriate commercial sponsor for that particular episode of BJ, in my opinion.

I guess that the McGruder Mansion, a/k/a ”Rose Cottage,” was too far out in the sticks for the Collinsport Fire Department to save that old dump in time? 

Do you think if this terrible act of arson actually did occur at Collinwood, would the Collinsport Police Department have bungled this criminal investigation as they did with just about every other criminal investigation they ever undertook?   

Thanks, Patrickm. I look forward to also reading that other novel by Amanda as well.

No doubt, they’ll be doing very brisk business at The Olde Collinsport Book Store with everyone in Collinsport wanting to read Amanda’s novels.