Evan Hanley: Preening Pettifogger and Maladroit Practitioner of the Black Arts.

Hey gang,

So far, we've seen the extremely narcissistic Mr. Evan Hanley, Esq., attempt to summon some hopefully, helpful evil spirits on two separate occasions.

The first time, Evan inadvertently conjured up the decidely, independently-minded Angelique Bouchard-Collins, who, promptly rendered Evan mute (something, I think we all wish Angelique would also do to Kelly Ripa!).

The second time, while Evan was trying to contact Satan in a failed attempt to cure Quentin's really bad case of lycanthropy, who walks in, but the "righteous" Rev. Gregory Trask himself!  (You know, if Evan had any luck at all, it would probably be all bad.)

Of course, I won't go into Evan's next clumsy foray into an act of incantation (suffice it to say, that the attempt blows up in Evan's kisser, figuratively and literally!).

Let's hope that Evan is a far better litigator than he is a so-called "necromancer."  (Hey, check that word out in your Webster's Dictionary!)

You know, I don't believe that we ever get to see Evan present a case in court (as we did with the original Rev. Trask, among others, on Dark Shadows).  

I wonder where Evan received his legal education?  Perhaps Evan attended Harvard University or the equally-esteemed Yale University.  However, I suspect that Evan graduated from that other renowned school of law, the "sister institution" of the world famous Cleveland Institute of Electronics or C.I.E. (also a frequent commercial sponsor on the Sci-Fi Channel), the highly prestigious Cleveland Institute of Jurisprudence!

Yes, old C.I.J., a hallowed academic institution that can rightfully crow about its outstanding faculty, chosen from the finest legal scholars, litigators and legislators in our nation, men and women such as:

Leslie Abramson
Gloria Allred
F. Lee Bailey
Arnie Becker
Johnnie Cochrane
Al Damato
Charles Dawson
John Dean
Alan Dershowitz
Webb Hubbell
Robert Kardashian
Ally McBeal
John Mitchell
Janet Reno
Arlen Specter
and Robert Torricelli, to name but a few.

I believe that it can be confidently stated, that as a result of his formative years at C.I.J., Mr. Evan Hanley, Esq., upholds the highest standards of both moral probity and legal "ethics."

Bob the Bartender, who readily apologizes to any JD's or "necromancers," who I may have offended by this posting.

ROTFL Bob have to say we really missed you! Kelly ripa!
heehee

jennifer
is  Bart C. from Montreal really 300 lbs as reported here on sports radio?

Hey gang,

So far, we've seen the extremely narcissistic Mr. Evan Hanley, Esq., attempt to summon some hopefully, helpful evil spirits on two separate occasions.

The first time, Evan inadvertently conjured up the decidely, independently-minded Angelique Bouchard-Collins, who, promptly rendered Evan mute (something, I think we all wish Angelique would also do to Kelly Ripa!).

The second time, while Evan was trying to contact Satan in a failed attempt to cure Quentin's really bad case of lycanthropy, who walks in, but the "righteous" Rev. Gregory Trask himself!  (You know, if Evan had any luck at all, it would probably be all bad.)

LOL!  Wait until the episode in which he's uttering a spell in grave, hushed tones, and a stagehand runs across the set.  

Cheers,

Linda

har! that's Kelly LEE Ripa!

and you had me grabbing my dictionary! [did ya see 70's show last nite?  'I could have lived forever without knowing about mucus membranes!!!!']

Evan should have been on Seinfeld - he looks like he's always about to say: [with clinched teeth] 'NEWMAN!'

.......uh oh, I may feel a substitute script coming on.........

Jennifer,

I think that Bartolo C. (now of the Windy City) makes the venerable T. Elliott Stokes look like the wiry, but witty Eric Forman of That '70s Show by comparison.

Ringo,

The acid-tongued Red Forman of That '70s Show reminds me of the equally acid-tongued Mrs. Sarah Johnson of Dark Shadows.  I like Red's trademark rhetorical question: "How'd you like my foot/shoe up your @%#?"

Bob the Bartender, who thinks that Eric's girlfriend Donna is the Maggie Evans of the new millennium.

 I like Red's trademark rhetorical question: "How'd you like my foot/shoe up your @%#?"

Howl!!!

and Re: Donna - my friends and I have already had modified the classic Ginger/Marianne debate to 'Donna or Jackie' and 'Big Red' wins hands down.  ......little help, Donna?

Ringo,

Yes, "Big Red," a/k/a Donna (Laura Prepon) is another lovely Jersey girl.  I guess the Boss was right when he sang that Tom Waits (?) song many years ago.  At least, his second "better half" grew up along the beautiful "Joisey" shore.

Bob the Bartender, avid Jersey afficionado!

PS Dark Shadows look-alikes: The soon-to-be-arriving Aristede and That '70s Show's "Fez"