Hey gang,

Of all of the most disagreeable members of the Collins family (and with PT1970 Quentin Collins and 1840's Gabriel Collins there have been more than just a few of them), I  find Judith Collins-Trask, the late-19th century mistress of Collinwood, the most difficult to figure out.

When we first see Judith during the start of the 1897 storyline, Judith almost seems to revel in locking horns with her younger brothers, uppity Edward and Carl "The Comedian" Collins, for control of the family fortune.  When perpetual bad-boy Quentin Collins shows up, Judith wastes no love on the youngest and, aguably, most charming Collins sibling either.

Of course, Judith is "slightly" less than thoughtful and generous towards the members of the Collinwood staff as well; Judith treats Collinwood head groundskeeper Dirk Wilkins like the proverbial peon (but, then again, Dirk does eventually even the score with his bumptious boss), and, the shameles way that Judith treats the long-suffering, but, ever-faithful Beth Chavez is way beyond the pale.

In addition, being the inveterate nasty-yenta that she is, Judith tries (unsuccessfully) to convince Collins family matriarch Grandmama Edith Collins to evict Edith's friend/fortuneteller, Magda Racosi and Magda's picaresque husband, Sandor, from the Old House.  In short, Judith Collins is an extremely parsimonious and cynical individual, who probably wouldn't give her own loving mother the time of day on Christmas morning.

And, yet, after Edith dies and leaves virtually everything in her will to Judith and in sole charge of Collinwood, what does "Miss Misanthrope of 1897" do?  She proceeds to fall in love with the shifty Rev. Gregory Trask, a true Tartuffe, and a man I like to think of as "The Eliot Spitzer of Collinsport, Maine"!  I mean, how could someone as suspicious and  judgmental as Judith fall for a pious con man like the Rev. Trask?  (And Judith marries the oily and sanctimonious creep about a week, maybe, after the "reverend" has his "beloved" wife Minera "offed." Go figure!)

So, is Judith the shrew to end all shrews or is she a poor, misunderstood and, ultimately, lonely soul, looking for love in, most decidely, the wrong place?

Bob the Bartender

Hey gang,

As I was watching "The DaVinci Code" the other night , I was struck at how much the stunningly beautiful French actress, Audrey Tautou, looks like Alexandra Moltke of Dark Shadows.

PS That self-flagellating monk in the flick reminded me of a masochistic Diabolos!

Hey gang,

I happened to watch the 1945 film, "The Enchanted Cottage," on Turner Classic Movie recently.  In the film, the lovely Dorothy McGuire (uncharacteristically) plays a rather plain young woman named Laura Pennington, a woman who comes to work in a home located in New England.  In fact, the name of the town (or estate) in which she is employed is called "Eastwood" (sort of like Dark Shadows' own Collinwood).

Laura's employer is a stern, practical woman named Mrs. Minnet (sp?), who, as portrayed by veteran character actress Mildred Natwick, looks and sounds a heck of a lot like Mrs. Johnson.

In the film, young Laura falls in love with a returning wounded war veteran, portrayed by Robert Young.  As I saw Ms. McGuire and Mr. Young walking along the rocky shoreline of that unnamed New England state (possibly Maine), I could not not help but think that that scene reminded me of seeing  Barnabas and Vicki walking along the rocky cliff at Widow's Hill.

I wonder if Dark Shadows creator Dan Curtis may have been inspired to create the great Gothic soap opera after seeing Dorothy McGuire and Robert Young in this almost ethereal romantic film classic?

Anyway, Merry Christmamas and Happy Hanukkah to all of my fellow cousins across the vast and wide super information highway!

Bob the Bartender

Hey gang,

Just wanted to let you all know that the Turner Classic Movie Channel will be airing the uproariously funny 1971 film, "Bananas," starring Woody Allen (as the "immortal" Fielding Melish!) at three o'clock this Monday morning.

In the flick, Dark Shadows actor Bob "Blue Whale Bartender Bob Rooney" O'Connell portrays an FBI agent, who interrogates Woody Allen (ersatz/phony South American "liberator" Fielding Melish) in a scene at (I think?) Kennedy Airport. 

I can't tell you, how absolutely thrilled I was, to see Mr. O'Connell actually attired in a suit and tie, rather than in that drab flannel shirt, we always used to see him wearing, standing there behind the tap at the Blue Whale, with that all-too-ubiquitous stogie in his mouth.

Now, don't blink (or, God forbid!) go to the bathroom, or you might miss Mr. O'Connell deliver his one line of dialogue in this hilarious film.  (Watch for the late, great sports announcer Howard Cosell, doing "blow-by-blow" commentary, on the consummation of Woody Allen's and Louise Lasser's marriage in the film.) 

Okay, all of you Dark Shadows insomniacs, you'be been warned!  (I'm not taking any chances myself.  I'm setting my Sony Betamax videorecorder to "SP" speed to record Mr. O'Connell's one-and-only shining moment in a Woody Allen film!)

From Caption This!

M:(thinking) I can't figure out why this little girl from MAINE sounds like she's from Phili!

Buzz,

Oh, yes, little Sarah has a definite Philadelphia accent.  Then again, she could also hail from just across the mighty Delaware in Trenton, NJ.  (Believe me, south Jersey and north Jersey are poles apart in their respective patois!)

Then again, KLS , ("Ms. Land of a 10,000 Lakes") with her Old "Hoowse" pronunciation, sounds like she could also say "oout" or "Eh?" like a true Candian sometimes!

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