An Enduring Dark Shadows Mystery

[Tanis]

Knowing how arthritis feels, how did Barnabas even manage to get out of the coffin after lying in it for 175 years?  Wouldn't he be stiff.  Maybe they didn't have such things as arthritis in those days.  Probably took better care of themselves.

Tanis

[petofi]

As to the non- existence of a loo at Collinwood, I can just see Roger Collins' sneering reaction to an innocent request to use the bathroom:

    "We haven't any.  The Collins family never goes.  And if we did, it would never smell anyway."

Petofi

[Raineypark]

Knowing how arthritis feels, how did Barnabas even manage to get out of the coffin after lying in it for 175 years?  Wouldn't he be stiff.  Maybe they didn't have such things as arthritis in those days.  Probably took better care of themselves.

Tanis, I think if they didn't suffer from arthritis it was because they usually died of something horrible at a much younger age.  A splinter can kill you if you're unlucky enough to get one before someone invents antibiotics!!

Actually, I think Abigail Adams suffered terribly with arthritis...some reward for beating the 18th century odds!!

Rainey

[Julian]

The lost colony upped and moved to Tahiti, Amelia Earhart was abducted by aliens, and before Archie Bunker flushed his toilet in the early 70's, nobody in tv land ever went to the bathroom.

[Dr. Eric Lang]

Speaking of Barnabus  . . . Ok he gets out of the coffin after 172 years then the next thing we know he shows up at Collinwood to meet his family.  Where did he get the money to buy his new clothes?   Surely he wasn't buried with a wad of cash in his pocket.  

Hi murph. Barnabas knew where a hidden cache of jewels was buried/locked up, which is where he gets his money from. We see this small treasure trove early on in the Adam storyline, when Willie removes it from the hidden compartment in the Old House basement and retrieves Josette's earrings, which he gives to Maggie.

In the 1991 revival series, they are a little more explicit in explaining where Barnabas gets his money from. We see him removing this small treasure chest from a hidden compartment in the mausoleum.

[ROBINV]

Years ago, a friend who was a big fan of Cheryl Ladd's when she worked on CHARLIE'S ANGELS, said that a gorgeous gal like that doesn't sit on the bowl, squeezing like the rest of us.  Her poop comes out from a small slit in her abdomen, all wrapped in shiny foil, stinkless, perfect, like a baked potato.

I always assumed the same was true of everyone living at Collinwood or the Old House.  No muss, no fuss, and no need for a toilet.  

As for #1, well, out in the woods, I suppose.  Ever notice that there are some people you just CAN'T imagine defecating or urinating?  They just don't seem the type!

Love, Robin

[VAM]

Years ago, a friend who was a big fan of Cheryl Ladd's when she worked on CHARLIE'S ANGELS, said that a gorgeous gal like that doesn't sit on the bowl, squeezing like the rest of us.  Her poop comes out from a small slit in her abdomen, all wrapped in shiny foil, stinkless, perfect, like a baked potato.

Hey Robin,

  You come up with some of the most unusual information...

[Carol]

Well.....maybe that's why so many of the characters were out wandering the woods at all hours of the day and night--they were looking for just the right spot that hadn't already been used.

You know, poison ivy leaves can be used as toilet paper
  When I worked at the derm office, a patient came in with that complaint. He was out jogging when nature called and didn't have anything handy.

He wasn't too happy when he found out what he had!

[Bob_the_Bartender]

Dear RobinV,

I loved your comments on Cheryl Ladd of Charlie's Angels.  (Isn't the lovely Jacklyn Smith of Charlie's Angels, the ex-wife of one of Dark Shadows' most "beloved" actors?)

Your comment about observing nature's call in the woods reminds of an old rhetorical question that can be applied to Dark Shadows:  Does Willie Loomis #@%@ in the woods of Collinwood?  (I guess since they bury countless copses on/in the grounds of Collinwood, they might as well "bury" that other "material" as well!)

Scatologically yours,

Bob the Bartender

[Tanis]

I think what was was said about what Roger Collins might say would be just about right, "We just don't do those things."

Tanis

[Connie]

Your comment about observing nature's call in the woods reminds of an old rhetorical question that can be applied to Dark Shadows:  Does Willie Loomis #@%@ in the woods of Collinwood?  

I guess no one was paying attention the other day when Adam was bullying Julia, Barnabas and Willie around.  (I believe it was the scene before Willie showed up with the rifle at the top of the stairs.)

Anyway, Willie was trying to get out of there and Adam was saying no, and Willie yelled, "I gotta GO!" and proceeded to run up the stairs.

Proof positive.  There's a bathroom upstairs at the Old House.

Case closed.  

-CLC

[Mark Rainey]

Anyway, Willie was trying to get out of there and Adam was saying no, and Willie yelled, "I gotta GO!" and proceeded to run up the stairs.

Proof positive.  There's a bathroom upstairs at the Old House.

Case closed.

I like this Connie person. She has a very serious handle on the ridiculous.

[shadow=navy,left,300]--Mark[/shadow]

[Bob_the_Bartender]

All I want to say is, thank God that Maggie finally got out of that lousy Collins Mausoleum secret room!

By the way, didn't Barnabas and Willie bury Jason McGuire down under the dirt floor of the secret room about a year before?  (I thought that old Jason might have started to "spring up" through the dirt floor in the form of shamrocks right about now.)  So, how come there is now a cobblestone floor in the room?

Maybe Willie installed the new floor before he got plugged outside of the Evans cottage.  Or maybe Willie has worked very swiftly on the floor since he has returned from Wyndcliff.  Somehow, I just can't see the 18th century, aristocratic Barnabas Collins deigning to perform hard, physical labor, can you?

[Birdie]

I am sticking with the theory that the Collins family just does not have to use the facilities.  They are much like the nuns from parochial school they never heard the call of nature either.  At least that is what my mother told me.

Birdie

[scout75]

...I just can't see the 18th century, aristocratic Barnabas Collins deigning to perform hard, physical labor, can you?

Unless, of course, he's beating Willie Loomis with that wolf head's cane or building a wall downstairs for Rev. Trask.

But I guess that's really more recreation than labor...isn't it?