The Cleavers of Collinsport

[Raineypark]

Has anyone got the number for Child Protective Services in Collinsport Maine handy?

I expect Barnabas and Julia to start calling each other "Ward"  and "June" any minute now.

We've got Barnabas speaking to his youngest in that soft but authoritative fatherly voice, and Julia, sweetly smiling at Adam and ignoring the chaos he's causing.

And then there's Willie, doing a perfect impression of Wally Cleaver on drugs.....tormenting the poor "Beav" and whining incessently about having to take care of the little brat.

It would almost be hilarious if it wasn't so damned creepy.....because the "baby" is chained to a wall and has cigarette burns on his hands......sheesh.

On the other hand, how funny was it, watching Adam and Willie playing with the "family jewels"?  

Rainey

[jennifer]

That's funny Rainey
but how clueless were Barnabas nad Julia today
leaving Willie alone with Adam!


jennifer

[Mark Rainey]

LEAVE IT TO CREATURE, episode 1

Julia: "Barnabas, I'm worried about the Creature. He's been hanging around with Buzz Hackett and Eddie Haskell down at the Blue Whale."

Barnabas: "Oh, I'm sure he's fine, dear. He's old enough to make his own decisions. Besides, in a few more years, he'll be able to drink legally."

Julia: "B-B-But Barnabas... He's not been acting quite himself. Haven't you noticed that his complexion is a little green?"

Barnabas: "Maybe it's just a bug. It'll pass. But you might want to give him a little sedative before he goes to bed."

Willy: "Hey, Mom, can I go out to the movies tonight? There's a Darren Gross film festival at the Bijoux."

Barnabas: "Son, don't you have homework to do tonight?"

Willy: "I've finished it all, Dad. Well...sort of."

Julia: "Willy, is Maggie Evans going to be at the show?"

Willy: "Well, um...maybe she is."

Julia: (smiling knowingly) "Barnabas, I think it'd be all right."

Barnabas: "Well, as long as you're not out too late. Remember, tomorrow's a school day."

Willy: "Gee, thanks! You guys are swell."

Barnabas: "Just be sure you don't abduct Maggie. You know how suspicious people can be in a small town."

Willy: "Oh, sure, Dad. Well, see you later."

Sound of the door knocker.

Larry Mondello: "Hi, I'm Larry Mondello. Have you seen the Beav?"

Barnabas: "I'm afraid you have the wrong show, son. But come inside. We may have need of your brain."

Larry Mondello: "Gee whiz, the Creature really does have swell parents!"

Cue music.

[shadow=orange,left,300]--Mark[/shadow]

[Raineypark]

Oh, Mark, I'm not laughing, I'm HOWLING!!!

Can't you just SEE Willie creeping up behind Maggie in the theater and tossing popcorn at her?  Until Joe comes back and drags him into the alley and "teaches him a lesson"?  

By the way....I finally got my hands on your book!!  Some kid was standing there flipping through the last copy (naturally) so I just gave her the "Mother" stare, ("What is a child your age doing with a book like that?") until she put it back on the shelf and fled.  Then I bought it...

Rainey

[Carol]

Mark, I loved your rendition of Leave it to Creature.   It was a hoot! I think you have another hit on your hands.

[Daphne]

*falls off chair laughing* ROTFL!!!! Mark, you're a genius..... so after the commercial break, there's more, right??  

[Minja]

So instead of Carolyn...who does the "Creech" abduct in upcoming episodes?

Angela Valentine
Violet Rutherford or
Miss Landers?

This was too funny Markus!!!![lghy][/color]

[shadow=purple,left,300]Always, Minja [/shadow]