sometimes the levers are sharp

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the ratio of sugar to spice has to be adjusted based on humidity and the phases of the moon

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I had to teach a goat sigh language first

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Great setup MagnusTrask ^_^

if he ran up the stairs at 88 miles he could travel to the past

^_^ Hehe

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it’s hard to find two birds

his experience with huge tracks of land.

Maggie:  No you can’t order a waitress to go!

Not sure if this is a favorite quote, but it made me laugh:
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Episode 979
Almost 17 minutes into it

David:  All I know is that when I grow up I’m leaving.  I’m going where the action is. 

Rodger (walking into the scene):  Action.  I know where the action should be.  In your bedroom.

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I’m familiar with the idea that the city has a lot more to do so it’s where the “action is”. 
I recognize the writers were trying to be clever and the dialogue does complement the scene.
Yet  . . .
I have to wonder  . . . Even when it aired it was it unintentionally funny?

Edward:  Mr. Trask this is an outrage!!!  Who would prop a paint up on the couch like that.  This is why we can’t have nice things.

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Edward:  I can’t believe you brought a picture of President William McKinley in this house!

Trask:  Edward you really should put your glasses on.  That’s the woman I was  . . . Uhm  . . . Helping.

Kitty Josette:  Veuillez vider mon pot de chambre pour moi.

Barnabas:  You do say the sweetest things Josette.  Wait did you say something about a chamber post?