DARK SHADOWS FORUMS

General Discussions => Current Talk Archive => Current Talk '26 I => Current Talk '02 II => Topic started by: Bob_the_Bartender on July 17, 2002, 05:29:32 PM

Title: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: Bob_the_Bartender on July 17, 2002, 05:29:32 PM
Dear Fellow Dark Shadows Fans,

I found it very interesting how Julia explained to the extremely inquisitive Jeff Clark, how she and Barnabas were collaborating on a book on Dr. Eric Lang.  Hey, did Julia ever publish her "History Of The Collins Family" book, which she labored on for so long?

Perhaps she and Barnabas intend on entitling this new book, "And 'God' Created Adam: The Remarkable Life And Times Of Dr. Eric Lang"?  

No doubt, the estimable Dr. Hoffman has other tomes in mind, titles such as "The Three Face Of Maggie Evans" and "Presumed Guilty: The Incredible Life Story Of Willie Loomis."  Maybe Mark Rainey can offer some tips to the good Dr. Hoffman on how she might interest a publisher in her eclectic array of non-fiction works?

Can you think of any other books/novels the prolific Dr. Julia Hoffman might want to put to paper?

Sincerely,

Bob the Bartender, an enthusiastic member of the Kelly Ripa Book club.  
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: scout75 on July 17, 2002, 05:46:14 PM
How about Men Are From 1795, Women Are From 1967...

Or Who Moved My Coffin?: Dealing With The Mood Swings of the Undead...

Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: RingoCollins on July 17, 2002, 07:29:58 PM
Quote

Then there's Who Moved My Coffin?: Dealing With The Mood Swings of the Undead...


Dammit, I was thinking of 'Dude, Where's My Coffin?'!!!

Ringo [I gotta be quicker!][jester]
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: Connie on July 17, 2002, 08:55:03 PM
Julia wrote a book awhile back.  I just happen to have an ad for it right here:

(http://members.aol.com/beamoflite/images/julia-book.jpg)

-CLC   ;)
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: Carol on July 17, 2002, 09:35:08 PM
ROFLMAO!!!  I forgot about this! It must be in my library somewhere. I think I'll read it again and see what Barnabas means! LOL
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: Raineypark on July 17, 2002, 10:37:04 PM
I started laughing at the top of this thread and howled all the way down.

You people are the sickest, most talented bunch of head cases it's ever been my pleasure to meet.

Rainey....still laughing out loud!!
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: Perankh on July 17, 2002, 10:48:52 PM
lol Connie ;D
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: Bob_the_Bartender on July 18, 2002, 12:03:09 AM
Hey gang,

These are some especially inspired literary works for the good Dr. Hoffman to comtemplate writing.  I particularly enjoyed: "Men Are From 1795;Women Are From 1967," "Dude, Where's My Coffin," and, of course, Connie's extremely kind and glowing words of praise for Julia's "All the Men Who Want Me."

By the way, Connie, I find it fascinating that you're affiliated with the Selby Institute For Tantric Awareness.  Tantric Awareness, is that possibly like the ancient concept of "Tantric Sex"?

I understand that the normally reserved Roger Collins still laments the fact that he and his former wife, Cassandra Blair-Bouchard, never had the occasion/opportunity to engage in some wild, uninhibited "tantric sex."  And, as far as Dr. Lang's "super" man-made creation, Adam,  is concerned, well, we can only imagine how enthusiastically the big guy would have thrown himself into some "tantric sex" during some romantic, rainy afternoon in his West Wing room.

Sincerely,

Bob the Bartender, card-carrying member of the Legion of Decency.

PS The SpellCheck feature does not recognize the word "tantric."  Perhaps, "tantric" shoud now be added to the dictionary.
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: scout75 on July 18, 2002, 01:24:22 AM
Tuesdays with Maggie

Angelique's Ashes
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: kuanyin on July 18, 2002, 05:34:54 AM
Well, she didn't write it, but when Julia goes forward in time I would suggest she pick up a copy of "Smart Women, Foolish Choices".

Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: Karen_#2 on July 18, 2002, 05:54:01 AM
Quote
Julia wrote a book awhile back.  I just happen to have an ad for it right here

OMG Connie!! ROTFLMAOPIMP!!  [lghy] [jester] [silly]

Barnabas Collins: "What a load of crap." LOL!!!!
Love the Selby forward touch! [wink2]

Karen #2
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: Cassandra on July 18, 2002, 09:15:19 AM
Quote
Well, she didn't write it, but when Julia goes forward in time I would suggest she pick up a copy of "Smart Women, Foolish Choices".




Good choice Kuanyin!!

How about "The Other Woman"   or "  How To Love A Difficult Man"  or better yet,  "How To Stay Sane Living At Collinwood!"
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: Julia99 on July 20, 2002, 08:37:41 AM
Quote
How about Men Are From 1795, Women Are From 1967...

Or Who Moved My Coffin?: Dealing With The Mood Swings of the Undead...



I laughed so loud I woke up my guests .. .how funny . .I like the Dude where's my Coffin too.
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: Julia99 on July 20, 2002, 08:39:45 AM
Quote
Julia wrote a book awhile back.  I just happen to have an ad for it right here:

(http://members.aol.com/beamoflite/images/julia-book.jpg)

-CLC   ;)


Oh God where do i get a copy of that. . .i certainly want to see why Barnabas calls is a load of crap .. . oh my side really hurts you guys. . stop!!
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: ROBINV on July 20, 2002, 01:42:18 PM
Dumb And Dumber: How I Married Two Supernatural Woman  by Roger Collins

Death is the Only Life For Me by Elizabeth Collins Stoddard

My Funky Green Sweater by Adam Collins

Keeping Your Eyeteeth Sharp and White: A How-To For Vampires by Angelique Collins

Touching My Hair: A Tell-All of Obsessive-Compulsive Behavior by Jeff Clark

The Collins: A  ***ed-Up New England Family by Julia Hoffman, MD

Welcome to My Nightmare by Barnabas Collins

Bleeder Valves and Other Necessary Components of the Brake System by David Collins

Why Caning Should Be Banned by William Hollingshead Loomis

Love, Robin
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: RingoCollins on July 20, 2002, 10:00:17 PM
Quote
Dumb And Dumber: How I Married Two Supernatural Woman  by Roger Collins
..
My Funky Green Sweater by Adam Collins
..
Bleeder Valves and Other Necessary Components of the Brake System by David Collins
..
Why Caning Should Be Banned by William Hollingshead Loomis


Brilliant, RV!!  Is this the result of all that lust for Barney?

........

'Real Men Eat Cheese' - T.E. Stokes
----- and his followup 'The Joy of the Magic Herb'
Title: Re: Julia Hoffman, M.D.: Unpublished Author
Post by: ROBINV on July 20, 2002, 10:24:29 PM
RingoCollins said:

Brilliant, RV!!  Is this the result of all that lust for Barney?

Perhaps, Robin replied, batting her eyelashes flirtatiously.  A lady never tells, my dearest Ringo, because if it's possible for me to blush to death, then surely I would be dead right now!

Blushing, remembering some of my Barney fantasies from my teenage years,

Love, Robin