Dear Fellow Dark Shadows Fans,
Old Harry Johnson really distinguished himself today by his selfless, and, I must say, courageous action in stopping Adam from his suicide attempt. When Harry first saw Adam brandishing that sharp knife, you'd have thought that Harry would have turned tail and gotten the heck out of that room. But, no! Harry tried to wrestle the knife away from the angst-ridden man/monster, and succeeded in retrieving it from him.
I remember how Adam once flung the solidly built, two-hundred-pound Joe Haskell across the living room of the Evans cottage like Joe was a Raggedy Ann doll. So, I have to believe that the diminutive, yet, feisty Harry would have been thrown through the window, and ended up landing on the Collinwood garden fountain if Adam had persisted in his resistance!
You would think that the self-absorbed Caroyn Stoddard would have been grateful for Harry's quick and decisive action in preventing Adam from ending it all. But, oh no, the poor, little rich girl had to give the greatly misunderstood Harry Johnson some sarcastic lip!
You know, I think that Harry could provide Adam with a lot of the "practical knowledge" of the world, that the eminent Prof. T. Elliot Stokes just could not convey to Adam.
I think that Adam could have learned some of this "down-to-Earth" information from William H. Loomis. But there just wasn't enough time for Willie to impart this essential information to Adam at the Old House.
Harry could educate Adam in such important matters as how to play and win at poker, how to handle two kinds of liquor in one night, how to properly utilize male contraception, and what type of weed to insist on.
I can see Carolyn knocking on Adam's West Wing door and entering. Adam is seated at his table, enjoying a "cigarette." Carolyn detects an unmistakable, pungent odor in the room. "What's up, Adam?" Carolyn apprehensively inquires.
Adam gazes languidly up at Carolyn and says, "Carolyn, I feel wonderful. This is heavy grass. Would you like a hit?"
"Oh, no thank you, Adam. I just wanted to know if you need anything?"
Well, I do have a case of the munchies. Would you mind getting me some Twinkies and a bag of potato chips?"
"I'll send Harry right up with those items. Bye!" The door quickly slams shut.
Sincerely,
Bob the Bartender, who, like former First Lady Nancy Reagan urges you all to "Just say no!"
