Hey gang,
As a public service (and, as the 1897 storyline regretably nears its denouement), I would like to review the specific rules of the Ten Commandments, that the Rev. Trask has flagrantly violated during his time at Collinwood:
Vl. Thou Shalt Not Kill.
Initially, the Rev. Trask enlisted the services of Evan Hanley, long-time attorney and semi-proficient practitioner of the Black Arts, to "program" Latin teacher Tim Shaw in a Manchurian Candidate-like murder of Minerva Trask, the reverend's diffident and kindly wife of many years.
Later, the reverend, in a last, desperate attempt to maintain control over Collinwood, strikes a deal with a particularly feckless fop to "off" wife number two. Clearly, the Rev. Trask has broken this commandment.
Vll. Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery.
Whew! Where do I start with this obvious moral transgression? The "randy" reverend has hit on just about every woman in and around Collinsport. To quickly review this extensive list, we have: Rachell Drummond, Dorcas Trilling, assorted lonely but wealthy widows, and, of course, one very voluptuous young woman by the name of Ms. Amanda Harris.
Can we ever forget the Rev. Trask's all-too-obvious and transparent offer to "mentor" Ms. Harris in her hour of "spiritual need"? I mean, how disgusting was it to see this over-the-hill and over-sexed coot hit on this beautiful and beguiling young woman? And, haven't we all seen this sordid and shameful scene played out before on a much larger stage? (I wonder if "Gregory," being the incurable romantic that he is, also, ever sent a copy of Walt Whitman's book of poetry, "Leaves Of Grass," to his comely "charge," Ms. Harris?)
Vlll. Thou Shalt Not Steal.
You really have to admire the reverend's gradual "progression" of thievery as he continually violated this commandment with increasing skill and cunning.
Initially, the reverend was content to cheat teachers Rachell Drummond and Tim Shaw out of some of the meager wages owed to them as employees of Trask's school, Worthington Hall.
Later, the reverend "graduated" to ripping off lonely and affluent widows of their financial assets. Of course, the Rev. Trask hit the big time when he conned Judith Collins into marrying him, thereby, giving him spousal control over Collinwood and its vast financial empire.
Trask's proficiency in defrauding people reminds me of some words of advice that Professor "Lombardi," my college auditing professor, gave us many years ago. Said the CPA to my class: "Ladies and gentlemen, if you're going to commit fraud, never steal anything small. If you are going to risk serious time in a federal penitentiary, always go for the large amount!" Somehow, I think that Professor "Lombardi" would have approved of the scope of the Rev. Trask's lack of probity.
IX. Thou Shalt Not Bear False Witness Against Thy Neighbor.
Remarkably, the Rev. Trask only violated this commandment once, when he tried to set up the learned but vainglorious Tim Shaw for the murder of the first Mrs. Gregory Trask, the mother of the formerly frigid Charity Trask.
X. Thou Shalt Not Covet Thy Neighbor's House, Nor His Wife, Nor His Maidservant, Nor His Ox, Nor His Ass, Nor Anything That Is Thy Neighbor's.
What can I say about this commandment? Is there anything that the Rev. Trask has NOT coveted/lusted after?
Given time, I suspect that Lady Kitty, Beth Chavez (if she had lived) and just about every other attractive lady in the entire state of Maine would have been a potential conquest for Dark Shadows' own version of Tartuffe.
In conclusion, I think that the Rev. Gregory Trask (who, by my count has broken, at least, five of the Ten Commandments) is, arguably, the most loathsome character ever to appear on Dark Shadows. I mean, Gregory Trask even makes Jason McGuire look like Father Flannagan, by comparison!
If Trask continued on with his ignominious behavior, there would have been the necessity for two more commandments, specifically:
XI. Thou Shalt Not Consort With Disciples Of The Devil.
and
XII. Thou Shalt Not Plot To Drive Thy Wife Bananas, Or, Failing That, "Offing" Thy Old Lady.
Bob the Bartender, who wonders if the Sci-Fi program "Scare Tactics" (hosted by the vivacious Shannon Doherty) will have as long and succesful a run as "The Dream Team" (hosted by the mysterious Annabelle Gurwitch and that guy with the extremely bad hair style)?
