Dear Fellow Dark Shadows Fans,
We have not seen the tempestuous Jeff Clark for a while now. (And, I know how really upset that makes many of you out there.) These have hadly been the best of times for Vicky's former fiance.
First, Jeff, who thought he had seen the last of Dr. Lang's morbid life transfer experiment, has been impelled to assist Barnabas and Dr. Hoffman as they attempt to "create" a mate for Adam. (Of course, Jeff is cooperating with Mr. B. and Dr. H. only because Adam has threatened to kill Vicky and everyone else at Collinwood if they don't make him an "old lady.")
Okay, then Roger offers Jeff a junior executive position at the Collins Cannery, but Jeff has to reluctantly turn down Roger's offer because of Jeff's current "job." Vicky gets ticked off with Jeff and subsequently returns her engagement to him. What a bummer!
To make matters worse, Barnabas mistrusts Jeff and later kicks him off of the experiment. (Doesn't Jeff wish that Barnabas had fired him off of that "job" BEFORE Roger offered him the cannery position!!!)
By the way, didn't Jeff (as a result of his anger and disgust at being "recruited" onto the second experiment) try to stick a scalpel into (1) Adam and (2) Eve's dormant body during this plotline? Gee, I thought that Dr. Lang's confidential psychological report on Jeff stated that Jeff had "no homicidal tendencies." (I guess that Dr. Lang should have left the psychological diagnosis to the psychiatrist, Julia Hoffman.)
Well, now Jeff must be lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling (in whatever flop house that he's now staying in) and wondering how it all turned out so lousy. I can see Jeff popping an eight track cassette into his stereo system and crying himself to sleep as Frankie Sinatra starts to sing:
"When you lonely heart has learned its lesson,
You'd be hers if only she would call.
In the wee small hours of the morning,
That's the time you miss her most of all."
Hang in there, Jeff. Keep your chin up. As David Crosby (the Grandpa Walton of Rock & Roll) once sang: "The darkest hour is always just before the dawn."
Bob the Bartender, hopeless romantic
