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Messages - Bob_the_Bartender

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2056
Current Talk '02 I / Re: Only His Hairdresser Knows for Sure
« on: February 09, 2002, 11:30:08 PM »
Originally posted by Bob the Bartender on Forum on February 09, 2002 at 17:30:08:
In Reply to: Only His Hairdresser Knows for Sure posted by Ben on February 09, 2002 at 08:31:05:

Ben,

I don't know about the hair style, but, at least, I believe that it really was Mr. Crothers own head of hair.

Bob the Bartender, who wonders if Collinsport had a barber like "Floyd the Barber" from Mayberry, NC?

2057
Calendar Events / Announcements '02 I / Re: OT: Thirty EIGHT years ago tonight!!
« on: February 09, 2002, 11:26:38 PM »
Posted by Bob the Bartender on February 09, 2002 at 17:26:38:
In Reply to: OT: Thirty EIGHT years ago tonight!! posted by RingoCollins on February 09, 2002 at 09:02:43:

Hey Ringo,

I vividly remember my late father being astounded at the sight of the "long hair" on the Fab Four that night on the Ed Sullivan Show. I guess it's like President Eisenhower once said, "Things are more like they are today, than they've ever been before."

Bob the Bartender, who agrees that the love you take is equal to the love you make.

2058
Current Talk '02 I / Re: Nominees-Most Poignant Moments on DS
« on: February 08, 2002, 09:03:16 PM »
Posted by Bob the Bartender on February 08, 2002 at 15:03:16:
In Reply to: Re: Nominees-Most Poignant Moments on DS posted by Gerard on February 08, 2002 at 07:59:22:

Gerard,

I agree completely with your selection of [spoiler]little Sarah's untimely death.[/spoiler]
It was as sad as seeing that young boy shoot his beloved dog, Ol' Yeller, in the movie with the same title.

Or how about that ending scene in the film "The Deer Hunter," when Robert De Niro, Merryl Streep and John Cazale start singing "God Bless America" to mourn the loss of their friend, portrayed by Christopher Walken. I remember there wasn't a dry eye in the movie theater as the Vietnam-era audience viewed the flick's conclusion.

Bob the Bartender, who lucked out with a high draft #.

2059
Current Talk '02 I / Re: A Heartfelt Suggestion for Dr. H.
« on: February 08, 2002, 08:50:51 PM »
Posted by Bob the Bartender on February 08, 2002 at 14:50:51:
In Reply to: Re: A Heartfelt Suggestion for Dr. H. posted by Julia99 on February 08, 2002 at 09:51:47:

Dear Julia99,

Perhaps the good Dr. Hoffman neglected to upgrade the amount of her medical malpractice insurance. Come to think of it, maybe Barnabas should make an appointment for a free consultation with Mr. Tony Petersen, Esq.

Tony would receive a one third contingency fee of any money that Barnabas was awarded at trial. (If that happened, maybe Julia would have to get an equity loan on Wyndcliff to make Mr. B. go away!)

Sincerely yours,

Bob the Bartender

PS Maybe Barnabas might be well served by getting a second legal opinion from our friend/counsellor, Ben.

2060
Current Talk '02 I / A Heartfelt Suggestion for Dr. H.
« on: February 08, 2002, 03:26:39 PM »
Originally posted by Bob the Bartender on the Dark Shadows: General Discussion Forum on February 08, 2002 at 09:26:39:

I was surprised to see the usually unflappable Dr. Hoffman seemingly "lose it," when Barnabas began to age very rapidly. However, I was moved by Julia's selfless offer to act as Mr. B.'s "cure" for his superannuated condition. I would like to offer Julia another suggestion to aid the aged and excessively wrinkled resident of the Old House:

  • 1. Utilize topical applications of Oil of Olay and Nivea.
  • 2. Give Barnabas a milk bath (use only whole milk).
  • 3. Familiarize Barnabas with the use of Just For Men hair dye (it takes only five minutes!).
  • 4. Drive to Bloomingdales and buy the store's entire supply of L'Oreal's Age Perfect Cream (share one half of the product with the reclusive painter Charles Delaware Tate).
  • 5. When preparing the next portion of her secret formula to cure Barnabas, add Shalimar Body Lotion to the concoction.

2061
Current Talk '02 I / Re: "That 'place' in Brazil...?"
« on: February 07, 2002, 02:00:29 AM »
Originally posted by Bob the Bartender on February 06, 2002 at 20:00:29:

Ben and Gerard,

Your points are, indeed, right on. Ms. Bennett displayed great sangfroid when she momentarily forgot the name of that Brazilian city. The grande dame of Collinwood hit a home run with her nifty comeback.

Nevertheless, I'm thankful that writer Gordon Russell did NOT have Burke's plane crash in that lake bordering between Peru and Bolivia, the one and only Lake Ti*icaca. I mean, Belem was difficult enough to remember. Incidentally, this famous lake was a South American body of water that Sister Imelda neglected to cover in geography class way back in grade school. After all these years, I wonder why?

Bob the Bartender, a lake nut

PS Do you think that Barnabas would have remembered that the correct city was Belem?

2062
Current Talk '02 I / "That 'place' in Brazil...?"
« on: February 06, 2002, 08:28:01 PM »
Originally posted by Bob the Bartender on the Dark Shadows: General Discussion Forum on February 06, 2002 at 14:28:01:

Dear Fellow DS Fans,

Thank the good Lord that Mrs. Stoddard remembered the name of that "place" in Brazil at the last second, specifically Belem. Otherwise, I suspect that Dan Curtis would have had an apoplectic fit up there in the control room!

I suppose it's also fortuitous that Gordon Russell, the writer of today's first episode, did not have Burke's plane crash somewhere outside that "place" in Kazakhstan (formerly part of the USSR). Somehow, I don't think that Mrs. Stoddard would have remembered the name of that Asian city, Alma-Ata, at the last second. Mrs. S. would probably still be on the phone!

2063
Current Talk '02 I / Re: okay okay its OUT there!
« on: February 06, 2002, 03:01:36 PM »
Posted by Bob the Bartender on February 06, 2002 at 09:01:36:
In Reply to: okay okay its OUT there! posted by Julia99 on February 05, 2002 at 21:57:46:

Dear Fellow DS Fans,

"Horizontal enrichment" on Dark Shadows. The mind boggles!!!

Respectfully yours,

Bob the Bartender, a former altar boy

2064
Current Talk '02 I / Re: Dr. H.'s "Strange Brew"
« on: February 05, 2002, 09:17:12 PM »
Originally posted by Bob the Bartender on February 05, 2002 at 15:17:12:

Quote
Dry ice baby, it was dry ice but it looked like one of those tidy bowl toilet pucks.

Dear Julia99,

But who was the "tidy bowl man" in Dr. H.'s pot, Ezra Braithewaite, Wally Strak, or perhaps it was Orville "Buzz" Hackett

2065
Current Talk '02 I / Re: Vivre Les Livres
« on: February 05, 2002, 09:10:52 PM »
Originally posted by Bob the Bartender on the Dark Shadows: General Discussion Forum on February 05, 2002 at 15:10:52:

Quote
Will the original cryptkeeper come back later?
Paul,

Regretably, I think that we have seen the last of actor Daniel Keyes (the ONLY Eagle Hill Cemetery Caretaker as far as I'm concerned), who issued that immortal line in his inimitable style to Willie Loomis outside of the Collins mausoleum, " Go! This is a frightening, evil place!" Darn, how I'm going to miss that guy in his dusty tuxedo and ill-fitting pince-nez glasses.

Bob the Bartender, who wonders if the unnamed caretaker was, in fact, the long-lost son of Boris Karloff.

2066
Current Talk '02 I / Dr. H.'s "Strange Brew"
« on: February 05, 2002, 08:56:58 PM »
Originally posted by Bob the Bartender on the Dark Shadows: General Discussion Forum on February 05, 2002 at 14:56:58:

As Julia was stiring her secret formula to cure Barnabas, it looked as if she were tossing marshmallows into that exotic crockpot in the Old House basement. Perhaps, friend Willy Loomis might have used Cracker Jacks instead.

2067
Current Talk '02 I / "Dark Shadows' Eavesdropping Episode"
« on: February 05, 2002, 02:22:26 PM »
Originally posted by Bob the Bartender on the Dark Shadows: General Discussion Forum on February 05, 2002 at 08:22:26:

Let's see Barnabas eavesdrops on Vickie and Burke. Next, we have Julia eavesdroping on Barnabas and Vickie. What's next, Mrs. Johnson eavesdropping on Roger and Vickie? Jeez! (How about David eavesdropping on Carolyn and Buzz?)

I can kind of understand why Burke is so reluctant to move into the West Wing of Collinwood after he and Vickie are married. First, Burke would undoubtedly bump into his "good buddy," Roger, from time to time.
(That would be as cordial as Don Imus bumping into Howard Stern.)

Second, Carolyn might "just happen to walk into the West Wing" to ask Burke his "advice" on some trivial subject. (The new bride, Vickie, would just love that, don't you think?)

Third, young David would continually prowl through the hallways of the wing, often locking Vickie in empty rooms, just for old times sake.

Then again, if Burke didn't feel like walking all the way up to the West Wing tower room, he could yell up to his long-haired bride, Vickie, in the window, "Victoria, Victoria, let down your hair." (With apologies to Rapunzel.)

2068
Calendar Events / Announcements '02 I / Re: OT: Minja vs. The Ice Storm
« on: February 04, 2002, 11:22:28 PM »
Originally posted by Bob the Bartender on the Dark Shadows: General Discussion Forum on February 04, 2002 at 17:22:28:

Dear Minja,

When I lived down in South Florida, people used to flip when the morning temperature toppled down to a "frigid" 48 degrees on rare occasions. The "cold climate" would be the lead story on the local morning news on TV. You would see people sporting their LandsEnd or L.L. Bean Down coats as they got into their convertibles. Just the least bit of over-reaction, don't you think? Of course, the annual onset of the hurricane season is something that the rest of us in the north do not have to deal with. All in all, I'd rather shovel the snow than worry about Hurricane "Barnabas" ripping the roof off the top of the house.

Bob the Bartender

2069
Current Talk '02 I / "Hirsute Sheriff and the Young Lady With the Floral-Patterned Flannel Quilt"
« on: February 04, 2002, 11:06:31 PM »
Originally posted by Bob the Bartender on the Dark Shadows: General Discussion Forum on February 04, 2002 at 17:06:31:

Today's Sheriff Paterson, portrayed by Angus Cairns, was the first sheriff to sport a full head of hair. I don't know about you, but I prefer Sheriff Paterson with a "chrome dome." Old George Patterson looks strange with the mop top look. It's kind of like seeing Col. Wilheim Klink with a thick head of hair like Charles Bronson's. As far as Collinsport's police chief is concerned, bald is best.

I'm a big fan of Maggie Evans (as my colleagues Gerard and Ringo will testify). However, Ms. Evans was wearing about the ugliest skirt I have ever seen her wear on the show. The dress looked like a L.L. Bean Flannel Blanket which Maggie had fashioned into a skirt. Maggie, please, next time wear something more becoming to you, like a pair of Jordache jeans.

Bob the Bartender, who likes Maggie most in a mini-skirt.

2070
Calendar Events / Announcements '02 I / Re: TLATKLS Alert
« on: February 02, 2002, 11:44:42 PM »
Posted by Bob the Bartender on February 02, 2002 at 17:44:42:
In Reply to: TLATKLS Alert posted by Gerard on February 02, 2002 at 15:47:41:

Gerard,

Gatsby's mansion sort of reminds be of Lyndhurst, the stately home used for Collinwood in the Dark Shadows movies. Incidentally, there's an amusing scene in "Night of Dark Shadows," when David Selby enters the artist's work room at the top of "Collinwood." Of course, all we're supposed to see through the windows is the wide expanse of the Atlantic Ocean along the rocky coast of Maine, Unfortunately, as David peers out of the window, we are treated to a wonderful view of the Tappan Zee Bridge which spans the Hudson River from Nyack to Tarrytown, NY!!! Another great DS blooper!

Bob the Bartender, who wonders if Pansy Faye ever sang at the Steel Pier in Atlantoc City.

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