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Messages - Bob_the_Bartender

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1516
Current Talk '03 II / Re:collinsport used cars
« on: August 05, 2003, 12:24:38 AM »
Quote from: Gerard on August 04, 2003, 01:48:21 PM
Oh, Bob the Bartender, did you ever bring back memories!  The Plymouth Duster - the second family car that every third family had.  It was a staple on the streets in those wonderful, wacky, and fashion-challenged mid-70's.  And then, like polyester, turquoise jewelry, platform shoes and bubble umbrellas, it simply vanished from the face of the Earth.

Gerard,

Ah yes, the beloved Plymouth Duster, an automotive staple of the "halcyon" decade of the 1970s!

Of course, another extremely familiar car of the so-called "Decade of Me," was the always reliable Chevy Nova.  If I had a dollar for every Nova that I saw cruising along the Garden State Parkway, the Long Island Expressway and the Connecticut Turnpike during the heady days of Dick Nixon and Don Kirschner, I'd probably have been able to afford a closetful of John Yaegar's timeless suits!

No doubt, Mrs. Johnson drove her lime green Chevy Nova every Saturday morning on Highway 9, as she faithfully made her way to the Hancock County Flea Market in that booming metropolis otherwise known as Aurora, ME.

Bob the Bartender, proud, former owner of a Volkswagen 411 (just like Harrison Ford's in "Witness," but painted a "conservative," bright red).

1517
Current Talk '03 II / Re:"Angelique's World"
« on: August 02, 2003, 10:34:53 PM »
Raineypark,

Gee, to me it looks an awful lot like a thirty-something, yuppie version of that medical emergency monitoring system commercial, in which Angelique is saying:  "Help! I've fallen and I can't get up!"

Bob the Bartender

1518
Current Talk '03 II / Re:collinsport used cars
« on: August 02, 2003, 05:27:54 PM »
Dear Denise,

What a great idea for a Dark Shadows poll!

Okay, let's see:

Adam - A Hummer H2 or, possibly, a Ford Expedition.

Harry Johnson - A Yugo or a Chevy Chevette (with an expired registration and no insurance, of course).

Dr. Julia Hoffman - A Volkswagen Passat, but one definitely equipped with a Sears Diehard battery, considering how infrequently the good doctor actually gets to start (much less drive) her car, what with her all-too-frequents sojurns into the past and now into Parallel Time.

Ezra Braithewaite - A Studebaker.

John Yeager - A souped-up Lincoln Continental just like actor Ron O'Neal's in the hit flick, "Super Fly."

Bartender Rob Rooney - A Plymouth Duster.

Eve - A Land Rover Range Rover with a state of the art cell phone so that she can always call Jeff Clark.

The Eagle Hill Cemetery Caretaker - A Model T Ford.

Professor T. Elliott Stokes - An ambulance very similar to the one used by Egon and the boys in "The Ghostbusters," but one also equipped with such necessary items as assorted talismen, diving rods, monocles and a couple of packs of I-Ching cards.

Dr. Eric Lang -  A Grand Marquis equipped with a trusty tape recorder so that the doctor can always record spur-of-the-moment brain storms/inspirations for Dr. Julia Hoffman's later use.

Jeff Clark - A convertible Toyota Camry Solara with super-sized vanity mirrors, so that Jeff  (along with everyone else in Collinsport) can admire his lustrous, flowing locks as Jeff tools around Collinsport Bay Drive! (Nicholas Blair might opt for that particular Toyota model also, but, "sans" the convertible top, IMHO.)

Bob the Bartender, a proud graduate of the Carolyn Stoddard Hawks School of Defensive Driving.

1519
Current Talk '03 II / Re:shagadelic
« on: August 02, 2003, 04:44:38 PM »
Quote from: onyx_treasure on August 02, 2003, 04:06:33 PM
Two famous ladies with shag haircuts:  Florence Henderson and Jane Fonda.

Yes, Jane Fonda in "Klute."

1520
Current Talk '03 II / Re:The Continuing Conundrum of the "CN" Cuff Links
« on: August 02, 2003, 04:42:04 PM »
Quote from: Mysterious Benefactor on August 02, 2003, 02:49:45 AM
And Carrie Nation would have been wearing cuff links because?  [confused_ani]

Are you trying to imply that she was preaching temperance because of frustions in a certain other part of her life?  [9341]

I guess that I'll just have to toss those old tried-and-true I-Ching wands on the table, to hopefully see what Ms. Nation was all about.

And here it comes... the 48th Hexagram,  the hexagram of high moral rectitude, of course! (What else?)

PS to Raineypark: Sorry about that!

1521
Current Talk '03 II / Re:The Continuing Conundrum of the "CN" Cuff Links
« on: August 01, 2003, 09:45:35 PM »
Carrie Nye, of course!  I happened to be watching that PBS program on the restoration of her house out on Long Island and who (or whom?) do I see standing with Ms. Nye on the porch of her magnificent home?  Why, none other then the late, great Louis Edmonds!

Apparently, Mr. Edmonds was a longtime friend of the Cavets.  It was both terrific and sad to see Mr. Edmonds appear on the program, knowing that this was probably his last appearance on television back in 2001 before he died.

1522
Current Talk '03 II / His Most "Prized Possession"?
« on: August 01, 2003, 09:36:52 PM »
Hey gang,

I'm sure we all remember how coldly evil Barnabas was during the time that he was under the control of the Leviathans (the so-called "bad" Barnabas of Dark Shadows).  Yes, Barnabas seemed to take great delight in tormenting the doomed Paul Stoddard with repeated talk of Mr. Stoddard's most "prized possession" (which turned out to be his nubile, young daughter, Carolyn)

Well, I wonder what the recently late, unlamented Bruno Hess' most "prized possession" would have been?

Perhaps Bruno might have said that his music was his most prized possesion.  Of course, "Ode to Angelique" might be the most prized composition of this most self-absorbed, "one-hit-wonder." Then again, the Steinway & Sons piano, on which Bruno created his paean to Angelique might have been his most prized possession.

Others might argue that Bruno's extensive and elaborate wardrobe was his most prized possession.  And, let's not forget Bruno's voluminous collection of chains, rings and bracelets, a veritable cornucopia of tawdry silver and gold, enough, I daresay, to make even Little Richard jealous.

Yet, I have to believe that Bruno's most "prized possession" was something much more personal to an individual of Bruno Hess' unrelenting narcissism.  Yes, I'm referring, of course,  to Bruno's own head!  Just think of that pearly-white killer smile, that sharp, but impressive aquiline nose, and topped off by that piece de resistance, Bruno's magnificient head of lustrous hair!

No doubt, Bruno had a demand in his last will and testament that his mumified head be displayed in its rightful place,  immediately next to the Mona Lisa and the Venus de Milo, so that countless, successive generations could marvel at and appreciate the timeless, esthetic beauty of his Caesar-like cranium.

Bob the Bartender, aspiring phrenologist.

1523
Current Talk '03 II / The Continuing Conundrum of the "CN" Cuff Links
« on: August 01, 2003, 08:47:08 PM »
Hey gang,

Barnabas was sure quick to surmise that those "CN" cuff links belonged to the mysterious Claude North.  Nevertheless, shouldn't Mr. B. have given some thought to the possibility that "CN" might have been some other person?

For example, how about the Parallel Time counterparts for these good folks:

1. Chuck Norris - the renowned karate maven
2. Carry Nation the great temperance crusader
3. Chester Nimitz - heroic Navy admiral
4. Charlie Neal -former Dodger second baseman
5. Czar Nicholas - deposed grand ruler of Russia

Can you think of any other possible "CN's" that may be tied to Roxanne, the enigmatic young woman with the same Jane Fonda "shag hair" style look from the flick, "Klute"?

Bob the Bartender, who wonders if PT Collinsport already had "CNN" on their cable system?

1524
Current Talk '03 II / Re:Q-MAN AS TARZAN???
« on: July 31, 2003, 12:41:32 AM »
Annie,

I thought that we were seeing a very exciting scene for a possible Dark Shadows spinoff show:  "Quentin Collins - Martial Artist!"

That "diving" karate chop that Quentin used on the always erudite Inspector Hamilton is, I believe, called a "shuto" in Japanese.

Who knows, the Q-Man could have been the next Bruce Lee, the next Stephen Seagal (Quentin certainly has the good, thick head of hair for that look!), the next Chuck Norris or, possibly, even the next Ralph Macchio (I can see it now: "Quentin Collins, The Twenty-Something Karate Kid"!).

Sayonara,

Bob the Bartender, a lover, not a fighter.

1525
Current Talk '03 II / Re:Angelique Stokes Collins (de Winter)
« on: July 30, 2003, 02:05:07 AM »
Quote from: Gerard on July 13, 2003, 01:27:03 PM
I don't think Angelique (PT, of course) really knew what love was; she was way too self absorbed.  She confused it with wanting to be worshiped, and the poor, little thing confused that with how she felt about Quentin.  She was undoubtedly the most popular girl in Collinsport, making herself that by being crafty (again, I'd figure her craftiness was more of the manipulative rather than the witchy kind).  As a teen, she had set her eyes on Quentin because he was the principle heir to the fortune of one of Maine's wealthiest families.  Certainly, the girl had no intention of marrying the grease-monkey at the Collinsport Auto Repair shop.  And once she manipulated herself into his life (maybe with the help of her father), everyone told Quentin that she was the only one suitable enough for being his wife.

Regarding her age and Daniel's age, I'm gonna squash numbers here.  I made Daniel 12.  Quentin (who I make to be 34) and Angelique married right after she graduated high school and she became pregnant during their honeymoon.

As for all those other men in her life, they were just more trophies.  She never had - you know - with them (unless she belonged to the Macrame and Zen website), but just strung them along.

Gerard,

On behalf of all grease-monkeys across America (Arthur Fonzarelli, Gomer and Goober Pyle, Mr. Goodwrench and Joey Buttafucco to name but a few), I think that Angelique could do a lot worse than with a man who's proficient with the use of a crescent wrench, IMHO.

Bob the Bartender, a big fan of that fascinating, "moustachioed" guy from Apex.

1526
Calendar Events / Announcements '03 II / Re:OT - BOB HOPE DEAD AT 100
« on: July 29, 2003, 11:06:22 PM »
I had the great pleasure of seeing Mr. Hope perform while I was a student in the midwest.  Mr. Hope opened his act by saying to the audience:  "I see that they let out all of the patients from the Menninger Clinic to see my show tonight!"  Of course, Mr. Hope's quip elicted much laughter from the audience.  I believe that Mr. Hope also performed the song, "Buttons and Bows" from his "Son of Paleface" movie during the show.

As with Raineypark's Vietnam veteran brother, I am also very grateful that Mr. Hope entertained my late father (and about ten thousand other soldiers) at a USO show in North Africa nearly sixty years ago.  Rest in peace, Mr. Hope.

1527
Current Talk '03 II / Re:Dark Shadows first to view Reality TV
« on: July 29, 2003, 10:44:01 PM »
Quote from: Birdie on July 25, 2003, 04:14:51 AM
O.K.  a little bored tonight so crazy ideas pop into my mind.

The Collins have no TV {that we know about} so what do they do for entertainment go to the Parrell Time Room.   They than set up chairs and watch.  Placing bets on what there counter parts will do, what choices they will make.

RT Quentin screems at PT Quentin  "NO, NO not that ugly plaid jacket with blue pants. Are you color blind?"

Julia shakes her head and thinks thank god I went to med school.

Liz can't understand how she could have married Paul Stoddard in two time bands.

Carolyn looks at Willie in a new light.

Willie looks at Carolyn in a new light.

Roger is glad that he chooses brandy in all time bands

Maggie wishes she had a sister.  And wants to slap her counter part for putting up with that sh**.

David wants to share with Daniel some good tricks to play on other members of his family.  Also wonders why he didn't get the same name or father.

Amy thinks her counterpart is boring.

Prof. Stokes wonders about growing a mustache.

Who knew that the Collins found reality TV 30 some odd years before the rest of America.  Now if only they had kept that secret.

Birdie,

Your scenario of RT Liz, Roger, et al, sitting in the hallway and enjoying the PT "show" in Angelique's room is truly inspired genius!  You could possibly call it "The Collinses: Portrait of a Parallel Time American Family," much like the 1970s breakthrough PBS program, "The Louds: Portrait of an American Family."

No doubt, Liz and Roger would have the finest Lazy Boy leather recliners (which both Willie Loomis and Harry Johnson had to haul up into the East Wing with much difficulty) positioned with side tables right in front of the PT doorway.

Can you imagine if while Liz and Roger were enjoying the "show," PT Angelique just happened to be "entertaining" Bruno Hess, Damien Edwards or Mr. Trask (take your pick!) in her room, and Roger turned to his sister, saying: "Liz, this tableau reminds me of that drolly amusing British bedroom farce we saw last year on Broadway."?

And what of poor Mrs. Johnson, schlepping drinks and refreshments all the way from the first floor kitchen up to that dusty and dimly-lit East Wing corridor?  "Here's your cup of tea, Mrs. Stoddard.  And, I apologize, Mr. Collins.  I'll remember to 'supersize' your snifter of brandy on my next trip up to the East Wing." (And under Mrs. Johnson's breath, as she departs, she whispers to herself, "You drunken pain in my @ss!")

Bob the Bartender, who wonders if they happened to have a "water closet," conveniently located near the Parallel Time room?

1528
Current Talk '03 II / Re:The Stepfather.......
« on: July 29, 2003, 09:57:08 PM »
And, let's not forget quite possibly Herbert Marshall's greatest role, that of the skeptical Montreal police inspector, who, cannot believe that Vincent Price's sister-in-law killed his own brother (actor David Hedison of "Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea" fame ), because his brother had accidentally (not to mention allegedly) transformed into a six-foot half-man, half-fly monster during an ill-fated experiment in the cinematic sci-fi classic, "The Fly."

Who could possibly forget that final, chilling scene in which Herbert Marshall (along with Vincent Price) is looking down at a tiny fly with David Hedison's head on it, caught in a spider's web and about to be ingested by a hungry spider, and pleading in a very squeaky voice, "Help me!  Help me!!"?  (Of course, Mr. Marshall's character did the only proper thing and squished both the fly and the spider with a heavy rock.)

1529
Current Talk '03 II / Re:Question Regarding HoDS......
« on: July 29, 2003, 12:45:57 PM »
Hey gang,

I believe the late (?) critic Cleveland Amory, in a review of ABC-TV's Dark Shadows in TV Guide Magazine, wrote (and, I'm paraphrasing here) that "Dark Shadows is probably the worst show in the history of television but, on Friday, I can't wait for the weekend to be over, so I can see what happens next on the show on the following Monday afternoon."

Bob the Bartender, who, happens to love wooden or florid performances (like Kevin Costner in any of his many, fine films.)

1530
Current Talk '03 II / Re:Roxxxxann
« on: July 29, 2003, 12:33:27 PM »
Quote from: Eleanor_Rigby on July 29, 2003, 04:11:49 AM
I always found that maddening too not only for that reason but also because Barnabas suddenly forgets his purpose so that he can pursue the beauty.  He did it in 1897, too, and almost screwed up the plan concocted by Angelique, Julia and himself just so he could be close with Lady Kitty.

Yeesh.   ::)

Dear Eleanor Rigby,

What can I tell you?  I know it isn't original but like so many millions of other guys, Mr. Barnabas Collins is the proverbial "fool for love."

Bob the Bartender, who thinks that Mr. B., might just for once, adopt Beaver Cleaver's precocious philosophy/practice of just saying "no to girls!" (Mickey Rooney and the late Frank Sinatra, among many others, might have employed that philosophy/practice also, IMHO.)

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