Hey gang,
I must confess that I was probably the first one to get all over Nicholas Blair for wearing that same lousy, gray suit of his, seemingly every day of the week! I mean, it couldn't have been very "pleasant" for the folks at Collinwood to be around this guy, parading/kvelling around the great house in the same outfit day after day (if you get my "drift").
Yet, to be comletely fair, I believe that it is imperative of me to point out that the enigmatic Gerard Stiles has been in that same black suit of his for about a month now. I realize that it's supposed to be winter time in Collinwood, circa 1840. But, ye gods! When Gerald Stiles, Esq. walks into the drawing room, it must be like "spring is bursting out" all over!!! ("Quick, open the windows!")
Okay, Gerard's not a bad looking guy, but how can Samantha, Leticia, etc. stand to be within ten feet of this fellow, let alone, cheek to cheek with this one-suit-man, who probably never even heard of dry cleaning? ("My, that's an unusual 'cologne' you're wearing, Gerard.")
No wonder Gerard Stiles (a/k/a Ivan Miller, by the way, that sounds like the name of a rookie forward on the Indiana Pacers, imho) frequently has that exceedingly saturnine expression on his face. (No doubt, he probably just caught a good whiff of himself!) And, at least, Nicholas Blair had both a double-breasted and three-piece gray suit in his wardrobe. That's double the number of suits that Gerard/Ivan has.
Maybe it's well past time that the ditsy (but lovable) Flora Collins opened up a charge account at Brewster's Department Store, so that her charming muse/house guest can get some desperately-needed threads, and stop smelling like Daisy May from "Little Abner." Yes, the inimitable Gerald Stiles, Esq., or as I like to refer to him as, "Mr. Stinky"!
Bob the Bartender, who's trying to cope with the devastating news of Dark Shadows' imminent cable tv demise by dwelling on these, all-important and earth-shaking matters.
PS My apologies, if needed, to our own Gerard. I certainly do not include him in with the sartorially-lacking, black-suited guest of the McGruder Mansion (that looks suspiciously like Ken and Barbie's dream house, imho).
