I just read Heather's long and fascinating post about Barnabas and I must say....BRAVO!!! Now I think I'll add my own two cents (equally as long and maybe even more!)
There's no denying Barnabas could be really selfish and awful at times but he was also a lot more selfless than people give him credit for.
Barnabas did treat Maggie really awful especially when [spoiler]he wanted to turn her into Josette and she kept refusing to give in. And I agree he was totally in the wrong for deciding that she should be the sacrificial lamb in the experiment to create a mate for Adam, the man who was at least partially responsible for her Pop's death. But you know once Maggie replaced Vicki as David's governess, I think Barnabas did grow fond of her and grew to care for her. Notice how panic-stricken he was when Maggie went missing for a couple of episodes during the Leviathan story (Jeb had abducted her and placed her in the late Sheriff Davenport's "custody.")
Barnabas also really treated Julia badly when she was trying to cure him in 1967....he was always so suspicious of her that he felt he had to throttle her whenever she didn't tell him every little detail of what was happening around Collinwood everyday. Once the curse is removed that first time after 1795, he does treat Julia much better (hey he stopped wanting to throttle her and that's definitely a big improvement in my book!) and grew to care for her very much. Unfortunately though he did seem to take her for granted at times, especially when he was lusting for whichever SYT that was in his life at the time. (Frankly, I don't know what he ever saw in Roxanne....Julia was much more attractive than her IMO). However I remember when he found out Julia had betrayed him in 1995 to the sheriff....she told him to go back to 1970 without her and he refused. "Never without you", he says. Such a wonderful moment of tenderness from Barnabas towards Julia....and when Julia went missing in 1840, thanks to Angelique and vamp Roxanne, Barnabas was so frantic to find her.[/spoiler]
Heather already named his other selfless deeds, so I won't repeat it.
Barnabas wasn't perfect, he had a lot of flaws and faults like everyone else, but that's what makes him such a fascinating character to watch. If Barnabas WAS perfect, would we all be talking about him?