Roger: I would appreciate it if you would allow me to take David into town so that We can buy his first athletic supporter.

Elizabeth: Uh oh... should I tell him?

That makes me think of my idea for a bumper sticker that says "Proud to be and athletic supporter"

Mrs. Johnson:  Mrs. Stoddard that son of yours is evil I tell you, evil!  Yesterday I was cooking stew and he actually cut up some potatoes and put them in.  And just today I was carrying out some snake trays and he opened the door for me.  

Abrigale--"Of course i like your dress Countess..but does your dress match any of the drapes around here??"

a literal lol   good one

Jeb:  Your tag is showing.  And the tag says not to use washboards for cleaning it. 

Maggie:  . . . and that's when Dad said I couldn't name my gold fish fluffy because it wasn't fluffy.  

Quote from: McTrooper on January 20, 2006, 05:38:05 PM

Samantha demonstrated how her friend did something she called a "credit card" to her butt.

[Not sure how many people know what a "credit card" is, but those who do may find this funny.]

I demand technical diagrams immediately.

Okay.  Your hand is the credit card (hand should be flat).
And someone else butt is the machine that you swipe your credit card with.
It's one of those silly prank-like things that people do.

Jon and Grayson look on in horror as the teleprompter bursts into flames.
Grayson:  Now we'll have to use cue cards. 

Chris and Amy's ventriloquist act was a bit unusual.
Chris:  How have you been since the little accident?
Amy:  Fine, now I can finally fly without antiperspirant.